The Fifth Musketeer

Emmanuelle


            Philip "Philly" Fillmore (Eric Brown) is the 15-year-old son of a rich widowed and sexualy active businessman in Albuquerque who has left town on an extended summer "business" trip, leaving the young man in the passing care of Nicole Mallow (Sylvia Kristel), a sexy French housekeeper, and Lester Lewis (Howard Hesseman), the family's chauffeur.Philly becomes infatuated with Nicole. One evening, when she spots him peeping into her room, she tells him to close her door. To Philly's utter shock, she means for him to close her door from the inside and then watch her undress. However, it is too much for him when a topless Nicole asks him to touch her breasts. When he objects, she steps back and instead takes off her underwear. Philly panics and leaves.Later on, he is surprised to find her in his father's bathtub. Once again to his amazement, she asks him to join her. He objects, but she keeps sweet-talking him until he finally gives in. However, he decides to wear boxer shorts. Once in the bathtub, she spoons and kisses him from behind. When she tries to take off his boxers from behind, he insists that she off the lights first. But once she reaches for his private area, he again panics and rushes out. She follows him to apologize, kisses him and directly invites him to sleep with her, the sexual element of which he fails to comprehend at first.After they flirt in a movie theater the following day, he gives in but backs down when she reacts without fondness to the notion of marrying him. One day later, she tells him she guesses they can at least date for a while. After they flirt during their first date in a restaurant, they return home and have sex.Nicole is revealed as an illegal immigrant; Lester is using this secret to blackmail her into helping him in a larger blackmail scheme against Philly to swindle him out of his inheritence. Lester intends that Nicole seduce Philly then fake her own death during intercourse. Lester then "helps" the panicked Philly to secretly bury Nicole. Her body later disappears, and a note orders Philly to steal $10,000 from his father's bank account to prevent exposure of his role in Nicole's "death".When Nicole has second thoughts, Lester threatens to also expose her as a child molester. Nicole has truly fallen in love with Philly, and she reveals the truth to him. Philly decides to get back at Lester by convincing his school tennis coach (Ed Begley, Jr.) to pose as a police detective and intimidate Lester with questions about Nicole's disappearance. Lester panics but is caught with the money before he can flee the country. Nicole and Philly return the money to the safe, but they decide not to expose Lester's treachery. In turn, he reluctantly decides not to expose Nicole's illegal alien status nor her acts of child molestation, and as a result, he keeps his job.Nicole fears that Philly's father will eventually discover their affair, and decides to leave. Before she does, she and Philly have sex one last time. A few weeks later, summer comes to an end. Philly returns to high school. In homeroom class he thanks his teacher for advising him to pursue girls whose age is more appropriate for him, and successfully asks her out to dinner.
    

Private Lessons


            
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Lady Chatterley's Lover


            Would you believe, The Nude Bomb is based on the 1960s spy spoof television series Get Smart. In the film, Maxwell Smart (Agent 86) is called out of retirement in order to stop mad KAOS clothing designer Jonathan Livingston Seigle from exploding a bomb that will destroy every stitch of clothing in the world. KAOS demands a ransom in the amount of $10 billion dollars a month from the United Nations or they will detonate the bomb, making everyone nude.Smart's government agency, called CONTROL in the TV series, is called PITS, an acronym standing for Provisional Intelligence Tactical Service. There, he teams up with a new crew of agents to stop the nefarious plot. He is given a weapons specialist called Carruthers, modeled on Q from the Bond movies, a pair of teen genius geeks - Drs. Pam and Jerry Krubney - and three female field agents, Agents 36, 22, 34. Rounding out the team is Larrabee (Adams' cousin, actor Robert Karvelas), the only other regular cast member from the television series. Agent 13 - the spy who would be stationed in the weirdest places - shows up in an airplane toliet but as actor Joey Forman. The best idea of how to combat this challenge comes from Larrabee. He devises to render the nude bomb weapon ineffective by wearing food, are ineptly exploited through lame jokes and ill-timed sight gagsAgent 86 has only 48 hours to save the world from extreme nakedness. Several plot twists ensues, including a chase sequence through the Universal Studios' backlot tour - right through the Jaws ride - a trip to Innsbruck, Switzerland to interrogate international fashion designer Edith Von Secondberg, which leads him discover a mole in PITS. Testing every member of his team he finally reveals the Chief as the mole. After a high speed car and office desk chase,the Chief is captured and put in a hospital after an accident .This fiendish plot is a win-win for evil KAOS designer Norman Saint Sauvage, for he has created an indestructible but unfavorable fabric, which won't be destroyed. When KAOS agent Nino Salvatore Sebastiani confronts him he kills him intends to be the only supplier of clothing after they drop the bomb. Agent 86 uncovers that the unknown terrorist is St. Sauvage who is really a clone of Sebastiani. St. Sauvage launches the nude bombs and 86 attempts to capture St. Sauvage when he runs into a device that instantly clones the person. 86 follows him through it so as not to be outnumbered. A few more trips through the cloning machine and the screen is filled with Maxes and St. Sauvages. St. Sauvage dons a gas mask and releases a poison gas that kills everyone in the secret lair. He goes over to one Max who is lying on his stomach. Turning him over reveals an Agent 86 with a similar gas mask who leaps up to finish this villian off. After defeating Sauvage, Agents 86 and 22 join the real Chief and escape the lair as it blows up. The final image is of Max, Agent 22 and the Chief with their clothes gone due to the fallout from one of the bombs running down the road with THE END covering their ends.Those who are fans of the TV show should not expect to see this as a reunion film. The Chief is played by Dana Elcar (as Edward Platt had died a few years earlier), Dick Gautier as Hymie the Robot, and Barbara Feldon's character, Agent 99, are not even mentioned. Nor is there any reference made to 86 being married to 99.
    

Sylvia Kristel

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