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Neon Joe, Werewolf Hunter


            Gabriel Van Helsing (Hugh Jackman) has been ordered by the Vatican to search out and
destroy Count Vladislaus Dracula (Richard Roxburgh), an assignment that doesn't make Van
Helsing very happy. He is tired of killing monsters for the Church, only
to be branded by the public as a murderer with a price on his head. He
also wishes that he had back his memories, something that was taken away
from him due to his previous sins. Cardinal Jinette (Alun Armstrong) explains that this
assignment is important because, 450 years ago, a Transylvanian knight
named Valerius the Elder promised God that his family would never rest nor
enter heaven until they vanquished Dracula. However, Dracula still lives,
but only two of Valerius' descendents -- Princess Anna (Kate Beckinsale) and Prince Velkan (Will Kemp)
-- remain. The Valerius family is running out of time, and the Church is
committed to saving their souls. So, armed with only a scrap of a picture,
rings of garlic, holy water, a silver stake, a crucifix, an automatic
crossbow, and Friar Carl (David Wenham), the Q of the Vatican, Van Helsing takes off for
Transylvania.Van Helsing's arrival in Transylvania is not well met, as
Transylvanians don't like strangers. As Princess Anna challenges their
business there, Van Helsing notices three harpies flying towards them.
They are Dracula's three brides -- Aleera (Elena Anaya), Marishka (Josie Maran), and Verona (Silvia Colloca). It's
obvious that they are trying to nab Anna. In fact, they succeed in
carrying her off several times, but Van Helsing manages to get her back.
He finally destroys Marishka by dipping his crossbow in holy water before
shooting her with a dart. Oddly, the villagers are angry with Van Helsing
for killing Marishka. They explain that the vampires only kill one or two
a month to satisfy their needs. Now, thanks to him, they will kill more
out of revenge.Dracula isn't happy about it either. Not only is he now short one
bride, but a year ago, after setting up Victor Frankenstein (Samuel West) with his own
laboratory, the villagers set Frankenstein's monster on fire, and Dracula
needed the Monster in order to give life to his offspring (Dracula's
children are born dead and must be animated). Then, just a few days ago,
Velkan Valerius destroyed Dracula's werewolf with a silver bullet,
although it cost Velkan his life when the werewolf grabbed him just before
he fell over a steep cliff.Grateful that Van Helsing saved her life and destroyed Marishka, Anna
takes Van Helsing and Carl back to the castle where the Valerius family
has lived for hundreds of years following Dracula's human death. That
evening, Anna wants to go out vampire hunting, but Van Helsing, preferring
to wait until daylight, sprays her with knockout spray. When Anna later
awakens, the halls are dark and Van Helsing is nowhere to be found. Still,
someone is there. It's a werewolf, but not just any werewolf. It's her
brother, Velkan. Apparently, Velkan was bitten by the werewolf on the way
down, survived the fall, and now he is a werewolf, too. When the moon
suddenly goes behind a cloud, Velkan changes from werewolf back to himself
just long enough to warn Anna. Then the moon comes out, and he changes
back into a werewolf and lunges at her. Van Helsing appears and fires a
shot at Velkan, but he leaps out the window. Van Helsing follows. Just
when Van Helsing gets a clear shot at Velkan, Anna stops him to let him
know that Dracula supposedly has a cure for werewolfism. Van Helsing
agrees to help Anna look for the antidote and try to save her brother.Velkan's trail leads them to Castle Frankenstein where Dracula, Igor (Kevin J. O'Connor),
and the Dwergi [ugly little creatures that work for Dracula] have strapped
Velkan to Dr Frankenstein's machine and are trying to harness his life
energy to animate Dracula's babies. Lightning strikes and Velkan's
lifeforce flows into the baby vampires who start to hatch. Thousands of
them. Van Helsing starts shooting at them. Dracula gets really mad and
starts attacking Van Helsing. Van Helsing stabs Dracula with the silver
stake, but it doesn't work. (The stake needs to be made of wood.) Aleera,
Verona, and the babies fly into the village so that the brides can teach
the babies how to feed. Suddenly, all the vampire babies start to explode.
The animation hasn't been successful.Dracula orders Velkan to kill Van Helsing and Anna. In their escape
from Castle Frankenstein, Anna and Van Helsing fall into a subterranean
cave where the Frankenstein monster (Shuler Hensley) has been hiding. Van Helsing shoots
him with a tranquilizer dart but refuses to kill him because he can sense
that the Monster is not evil (Van Helsing will only kill evil beings).
Before he passes out, the Monster explains that he is the key to Dracula's
research, that he is the one thing that Dracula needs in order to bring
life to his brood. Even though the last hatchlings died, Dracula has
thousands more waiting birth, he says.Suddenly, they notice that they are being watched by Velkan. Knowing
that Dracula will soon know their whereabouts, Van Helsing tries to take
the Frankenstein monster back to Rome for protection, but they are
attacked by Verona, Aleera, and Velkan. Van Helsing destroys Verona and
gets a silver bullet into Velkan, who later dies in Anna's arms.
Unfortunately, Velkan also managed to bite Van Helsing. Aleera picks up
Anna and flies her back to Dracula while Van Helsing, Carl, and the
Monster are forced to walk. They meet up with Aleera again in Budapest.
She invites them to a Halloween masquerade ball during which they can
trade the Monster for Anna. Van Helsing tranquilizes the Monster and locks
him in a church while he and Carl go to the ball.At the ball, while Dracula dances with Anna, he tries to talk her
into becoming his bride, but Anna will have none of it. Van Helsing
rescues Anna, but their escape is thwarted when Igor triumphantly brings
in the Frankenstein monster. Everyone at the ball turns into vampires and
goes after Van Helsing, Carl, and Anna, forcing them to jump out a window.
By the time Van Helsing, Anna, and Carl get back to Transylvania, Dracula
has cleared out of Castle Frankenstein and moved...to no one knows where.
They go to the library where Carl has done a bit of research and
discovered that Dracula is really the son of Valerius the Elder. The whole
problem started when Dracula was murdered in 1462 by "the left hand of
God." When he died, Dracula made a covenant with the Devil and was given a
new life that could only be sustained by drinking blood. That's when
Valerius the Elder went to Rome and bargained away his family's right to
enter heaven until he killed Dracula. Dracula being his son, however,
Valerius was unable to kill him, so he banished him to an icy fortress
through a door with no means of escape...until the devil gave wings to
Dracula. So where is this door?Anna reveals that her father spent hours staring at a particular
picture. Perhaps that picture holds the key to the door? On the door is an
inscription in Latin which Carl tries to read but cannot finish because a
piece is missing. Van Helsing remembers the scrap of picture that Cardinal
Jinette gave him before he left Rome. Sure enough, it fits. When they read
the inscription aloud, the picture changes into a mirror which allows them
to walk through into the snowy fortress which is Dracula's true castle.
They enter a long hallway in which the ceiling and walls are lined with
pods containing vampire offspring waiting to be animated. They also see
the Frankenstein monster encased in a block of ice with only his head
sticking out. The Monster sees Van Helsing and tells him that Dracula DOES
have a cure for werewolfism. Van Helsing wonders why Dracula would have an
antidote. Carl remembers seeing another painting that showed a werewolf
killing a vampire. Now it all becomes clear. Only a werewolf can kill
Dracula, and Van Helsing is scheduled to turn into one tonight at the
stroke of midnight. The plan is to let Van Helsing transform and kill
Dracula, and then Anna and Carl can inject him with the antidote at the
last minute.While Van Helsing goes in search of Dracula, Anna and Carl force Igor
to lead them to the antidote. Igor shows them a syringe stored in a jar of
viscous liquid. Indeed, it is the antidote, but before they can retrieve
it, Igor locks them in the room. Aleera suddenly appears. Anna tosses the
jar at her. It crashes on the floor, and the splash burns Aleera's face.
Anna tosses more of the liquid at the bars on the door, and it eats
through them. While Anna keeps Aleera busy, Carl takes the antidote and
goes looking for Van Helsing. Van Helsing has discovered Dracula's
laboratory. The Frankenstein monster has been hoisted to the roof, and
Dracula is attempting to drain his life into his infants. Van Helsing
makes his way to the roof, but before the Monster can be freed, lightning
strikes and sends his lifeforce down through the infant nursery. The baby
vampires begin to awaken.Just as the Frankenstein Monster gets free, Dracula changes into a
bat and attacks Van Helsing. The Monster is struck again by a bolt of
lightning that sends him flying over the edge of the roof. On his way
down, he manages to grab onto a cable and knock Igor off the bridge where
he's been chasing Carl with a cattle prod. The Monster swings through a
window into the room where Anna and Aleera are fighting. As the Monster
holds Aleera at bay, Anna uses the cable to swing back to the laboratory.
On the way, Carl tosses her the antidote. Aleera catches up with Anna.
While Aleera gloats about how she's going to drink Anna's blood, Anna
grabs a spike and thrusts it through Aleera's heart.Just then the clock strikes midnight. Van Helsing changes into a
werewolf and attacks Dracula. Just as Van Helsing has Dracula by the
throat, the moon goes behind a cloud and Van Helsing changes back into
himself. Dracula takes this moment to inform Van Helsing that it was he (Van Helsing)
who murdered Dracula back in 1462. Suddenly, the moon comes back out. Van
Helsing turns into a werewolf again and chews up Dracula's neck. Dracula
crumbles into dust as do all of his baby vampires (once Dracula is
destroyed, all his creations are also destroyed). At that moment, Anna
runs into the room with the antidote. Van Helsing leaps at her. Carl also
arrives and opens the silver stake, ready to plunge it into Van Helsing.
But Anna was successful. She injected the antidote into Van Helsing just
before she died, and Van Helsing is returning to himself. Van Helsing and Carl hold a cremation for Anna at sea. He sees her spirit in the sky alongwith those of her ancestors. She smiles and realises that she is at peace and with her family. Heading out to sea in hopes of a sanctuary, we see Frankenstein's Monster on a raft looking towards the flaming beacon and the two heroes.
    

Shuler Hensley

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