After a crippling injury leaves her husband impotent, Lady Chatterly is torn between her love for her husband and her physical desires. With her husband's consent, she seeks out other means of fulfilling her needs.

Low-born Helena is convinced that she and the high-born Bertram are meant to be. Bertram does not, so he runs off to fight in the Italian wars with his "#bff" Parolles, where he meets Diana. The lopsided love triangle all comes crashing down when the two women meet and devise a diabolical plan.