The Wolf of Wall Street


            
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Maniac

Comedy Central Roast of James Franco

Stutz


            Seth (Jonah Hill) and Evan (Michael Cera) are about to graduate from high school. Best friends for years, they face an uncertain future: Evan has been accepted into Dartmouth but Seth will have to attend the local state university. Both boys are notably horny but still virginal, something they want to correct before leaving for college at the end of the summer. Neither is particularly popular, as evidenced when a particularly obnoxious classmates stops them before school one day to not invite them to his graduation party. Seth and Evan do have female classmates to whom they are attracted. Seth is pretty sure that Jules (Emma Stone) returns his interest, but Evan is oblivious to the fact that Becca (Martha MacIsaac) wants to get with him. Seth resents Becca both for the trouble she caused for him in first grade when she revealed his obsession with drawing penises, and because she threatens his close relationship with Evan. In home economics class, Jules invites Seth and Evan to her graduation party that night. When painfully nerdy friend Fogell (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) reveals that he is about to get a fake ID, Seth is determined to provide the alcohol for Jules's party. Because Becca will attend Jules's party, too, Seth is convinced that he and Evan will have sex that night.Things immediately go wrong. Seth's car is towed when he parks in the faculty parking lot. When Fogell arrives with his fake ID, Seth is appalled to learn that Fogell has adopted the name "McLovin." Believing that the ID won't be accepted, Seth plans to shoplift vast quantities of liquor from a supermarket but chickens out at the last minute. Instead, he and Evan send Fogell to a liquor store. Much to his surprise, Fogell successfully uses his fake ID to buy the liquor. But before he can leave the store, he is knocked unconscious by a robber. Because they went to ogle a buxom woman down the street, Evan and Seth don't see the robbery. They do see the police car arrive and assume that Fogell is being arrested for using a fake ID. Distraught at having neither the alcohol nor the $100 Jules gave him to buy alcohol, Seth panics. He is then hit by a car driven by Francis (Joe Lo Truglio). Francis is desperate for Seth not to report the incident to the police and agrees to procure alcohol for them. Even though Francis is creepy, Seth and Evan accompany him to a house party miles from the liquor store. Shortly after getting there, Francis is beaten up by the home owner, Mark (Kevin Corrigan). Evan is angry that Seth has dragged him to this dangerous party and announces he will no longer allow Seth to dictate the course of their friendship. Seth accuses Evan of deserting him as a friend. Seth returns to the party to steal alcohol. He dirty dances with Mark's menstruating girlfriend and winds up with a blood stain on his pants. When Mark sees this, he picks a fight with Seth. Evan tries to call Becca but can't get good reception on his cell phone so goes back into the house to use a landline. He finds himself trapped in a room with cocaine snorting thugs who mistakenly think he is the golden-throated brother of someone else. He sings "These Eyes" to placate them. Eventually, Evan and Seth manage to escape the party with large amounts of alcohol concealed in two large laundry detergent jugs.Meanwhile, Fogell was not arrested by the police. In fact, Officers Slater and Michaels (Bill Hader and Seth Rogen) seem to be impressed with his taste in alcohol and ability to take a punch. Fogell winds up spending the night with them. He helps them subdue a violent drunk at a local bar and then shares a beer with them. They reveal a rather casual attitude towards police procedure and even let Fogell hold their guns. Slater and Michaels receive a call to break up a fight at the party Seth and Evan are trapped at. On the way to the party, Slater runs into Seth, knocking him to the ground. When he discovers alcohol in one of the detergent jugs, he plans to arrest Seth and Evan. But while Slater and Michaels try to devise a plan to explain the damage to the squad car, Fogell, Evan and Seth escape along with the detergent jugs and all of the alcohol Fogell bought, which he had been carrying with him while patrolling with Slater and Michaels. They take the bus to Jules's party. On the way, Seth learns that Evan and Fogell have already decided to room together at Dartmouth.Becca is already there and already drunk. Evan learns she has spent the evening drinking heavily and announcing her intentions to have sex with him. She drags him to Jules's bedroom and drunkenly tries to seduce him. He resists, wanting their relationship to be more than physical. She throws up. Seth has no greater luck. Convinced that Jules will sleep with him only if they are drunk, he gets inebriated but is surprised to learn both that Jules doesn't drink and that she would prefer they hook up when both are sober. Confused, Seth passes out; on the way down, his head slams into Jules's, giving her a black eye. When he comes to, he sees Slater and Michaels have arrived to bust the party. He rushes inside and, finding Evan drunk and passed out, carries him to safety. Michaels and Slater find Fogell in a bedroom about to have sex with Nicola (Aviva). Slater is angry that Fogell abandoned them but Michaels calms him down. They tell Fogell that they knew his ID was fake but remembered how much they hated police officers when they were Fogell's age. Wanting to demonstrate to him that cops could be cool, too, they took him out on patrol. They all agree to be friends. To impress the ladies, Fogell has Slater and Michaels drag him away as though he were a dangerous criminal. Then they go to a deserted parking lot, do donuts in the squad car, then trash it.Evan and Seth go back to Evan's house. They make miniature pizzas and climb into their sleeping bags. They confess that they will always love one another as friends. The next day, they go to the shopping mall; Evan wants a new comforter to take to Dartmouth and Seth needs new pants. There they see Becca and Jules. Becca thanks Evan for not taking advantage of her drunkenness and Seth apologizes to Jules for his own embarrassing behavior. Becca and Evan decide to go shopping for comforters and Seth will help Jules buy makeup to cover up her black eye. Secure in their friendship, Seth and Evan are finally comfortable being apart.Summary: Two high school best friends forever (Jonah Hill, Michael Cera) go on a mission to provide alcohol for a graduation party in hopes of losing their virginity.After facing the fact that both Seth [Jonah Hill] and Evan [Michael Cera] will both be going to different colleges next year, it seems more imporant than ever that they go to a high school party, and achieve some of their long time goals; including, but not limited to, losing thier virginity with the girl of their dreams by getting them wasted and being their "regret hookup." Their awkard friend Fogell [Christopher Mintz-Plasse] gets a fake ID, with just the name McLovin [it was either that or Mohammid], and agrees to get liquor to bring to Jules' [Emma Stone] aka Seths dream girl's graduation party. All seems to be going well until McLovin is suckerpunched in the liquor store by a robber. When the police come, they try to get a story out of the clerk, but she is too worried about her exam tomorrow, so their question McLovin, which they give offer to give a ride home [more hillarity ensues].All in all the boys almost / briefly get laid, and learn that its just better to man up and confront the girl than try to / count on her geting wasted if you like her.
    

Superbad


            The Oakland Athletics baseball team won many games and succeeded in reaching the "Playoffs" games of the 2001 post-season. When they lose the elimination games against the Yankees, their general manager Billy Beane (Brad Pitt) is very disappointed. He knows that several good players will soon be leaving the team: i.e. star players Johnny Damon (Johnny Damon), Jason Giambi (Jason Giambi), and Jason Isringhausen. Beane negotiates for replacement players in the hope of assembling a competitive team for the following year, but the teams budget for payroll is limited. During a visit to the Cleveland Indians, Beane meets Peter Brand (Jonah Hill). Brand says that he is a Yale economics graduate. Beane sees that Brand has radical ideas about assessing players' value. Beane tests Brand's theory by asking whether Brand would have drafted him. Despite the fact that Beane was a Major League player before becoming general manager, and scouts considered Beane a phenomenal player, Brand says that he would not have drafted Beane until the ninth round. He adds that Beane would probably have gone to college instead. Sensing opportunity, Beane hires Brand as the Athletics' assistant general manager.The team's scouts are first dismissive of and then hostile towards Brand's non-traditional ideas for scouting players. Rather than relying on the scouts' experience and intuition, Brand selects players based almost exclusively on their on base percentage (OBP). By finding players with a high OBP but characteristics that lead scouts to dismiss them, Brand assembles a team of undervalued players with far more potential than the A's hamstrung finances would otherwise allow. Despite vehement objections from the scouts, Beane supports Brand's theory and hires the players he selected, such as unorthodox submarine pitcher Chad Bradford (Casey Bond). Following the free agent signings, Beane finds that he also faces opposition from Art Howe (Philip Seymour Hoffman), the Athletics' manager. With tensions already high between them because of a contract dispute, Howe disregards Beane and Brand's strategy and plays the team in a traditional style despite their unsuitability. Beane is eventually forced to trade away the lone traditional star player, Carlos Peña (Gerardo Celasco), to force Howe to use the new recruits.Early in the season, the Athletics fare poorly, leading critics within and outside the team to dismiss the new method as a dismal failure. Beane convinces the owner to stay the course, and eventually the team's record begins to improve. Ultimately, the Athletics win an unprecedented 20 consecutive games, setting the American League record. Their streak is capped with a victory over the Kansas City Royals. Like many baseball players, Beane is superstitious and avoids attending or sometimes even following games as they are in progress. His family convinces him to go to the A's game against the Royals, as Oakland is already leading 11 to 0 after the third inning and appears set to continue their winning streak. Beane arrives, only to watch the team go to pieces and allow the Royals to even the score. Finally, the A's do clinch the victory with a walk-off home run by one of Brand's picks, Scott Hatteberg (Chris Pratt). Despite all their success, the A's lose in the first round of the postseason, this time to the Minnesota Twins. Beane is disappointed, but satisfied at having demonstrated the value of his and Brand's methods.In closing, the film notes that Beane passed up the opportunity to become the general manager of the Boston Red Sox, despite an offer of $12.5 million a year salary, which would have made him the highest paid GM in baseball history. Also noted is Boston's World Series victory soon after in 2004, based on the theories that Beane pioneered.
    

Moneyball

Dumb: The Story of Big Brother Magazine

Mid90s


            The film opens with a flashback: as two planets are sucked into a black hole, each one sends out a rocket ship carrying an infant boy of that planet, the last of their kind. One child, a handsome boy endowed with superpowers, landed in a mansion and was admired by all; he became the superhero Metro Man. The other, a blue-skinned baby with super genius, ended up in a prison and was shunned by society; he became the supervillain Megamind, Metro Man's rival.All is as usual in Metro City: the town felicitates Metro Man with the inauguration of his own museum, when Megamind gatecrashes the event and announces that he has (once again) escaped from prison with the help of his childhood friend/henchman Minion. Following routine, he has once again kidnapped Metro Man's girlfriend, reporter Roxanne Ritchi. Megamind lures Metro Man into a sealed observatory which will be blown up by a laser, but the laser takes too long to start up, so once more Megamind has failed and Metro Man is victorious... but Metro Man can't escape the observatory. He states that the observatory is lined with copper, which drains his powers. Unable to escape when the laser activates, Metro Man is incinerated into a skeleton. Megamind has fulfilled the supervillain's dream, to the shock of everyone (including Megamind himself): he has vanquished the superhero, and Metro City is now his to take over!Megamind revels in his victory, and sets about vandalizing and pillaging Metro City. However,as time passes he becomes depressed and empty. He realizes that a supervillain has no point without a superhero to fight: without Metro Man, his life has lost all fun, challenge and purpose. He pays a visit to the Metro Man museum to express his condolences, and there meets Roxanne, who has come for the same reason. He disguises himself as the museum curator Bernard, and the two establish a friendship with each other. Roxanne is optimistic that a hero will soon rise to oppose Megamind's villainy, and this gives Megamind an idea: if heroes were 'not born but created', he will create a hero to fight, and thus restore balance to Metro City and purpose to his life!Megamind uses Metro Man's DNA to forge a special serum that provides superpowers. However at the moment of near completion, Roxanne sneaks into Megamind's lair to find out what his future evil plans are. In the resulting melee the serum is accidentally ingested by Roxanne's friend Hal Stewart, a smug and lazy cameraman who has an obsessive crush on Roxanne and who's been overlooked and ignored his whole life. Despite these qualities, Megamind feels Hal was chosen by destiny for heroics. Megamind, disguised as a Space Dad, trains Hal into Titan, Metro City's upcoming new hero. Titan appears to Roxanne and carries out superhuman feats to impress her, but she rejects him because she likes Bernard.In the meantime, Megamind carries on a romance with Roxanne through his Bernard alias, which starts to give him hope about a normal life, beyond villainy. This unfortunately creates conflict with Minion, who believes that as villains they'll never find romance or acceptance. A quarrel ensues between the duo, which ends with Minion leaving because he thinks Megamind doesn't need him anymore. Later, at a romantic dinner, Roxanne discovers Megamind's disguise and rejects him.Heartbroken and friendless, Megamind does what supervillains do: start a rampage across town and a battle with a superhero. But Titan does not show up, and eventually Megamind has to head over to Hal's apartment to pick him up. There he discovers Titan has had enough of rejection, and has decided to strike back and become a supervillain, offering a team up with Megamind. A shocked Megamind reveals his Space Dad and Bernard identities to Titan and successfully provokes a superhuman fight. But upon defeating Megamind, an enraged Titan tries to murder him; Megamind barely escapes, and Titan proclaims himself Metro City's new supervillain and starts tearing up the town.Noting that a copper-based attack proved ineffective on Titan, Megamind convinces a reluctant Roxanne to head to Metro Man's lair to check for anything that could help stop Titan. They both check out the base, and discover to their shock that Metro Man is staying there, alive! He explains to them that he'd always wanted to be a musician, but just like Megamind he got typecast and trapped as a superhero, and eventually the role became too unbearable; he thus faked his weakness to copper and subsequent death, to forever rid himself of heroism. He refuses to return, and nominates Megamind as his successor and Roxanne backs him up, but Megamind refuses as he believes he is condemned to be a villain for life.Megamind turns himself into the prison he was raised, while Roxanne heads into Metro City to try to reason with Titan. Titan, gone over the edge, instead captures Roxanne and makes a TV broadcast to call out Megamind, exhibiting her to make sure he comes. Roxanne begs Megamind to save her and Metro City from Titan, and Minion returns to stand by Megamind's side; this finally inspires him to escape from prison. A fierce battle follows across Metro City, where Megamind eventually defeats Titan by stripping him of his powers, turning him back into Hal.The film ends with Hal in Megamind's prison cell, and Megamind being accepted and hailed by Metro City as its new hero, with Roxanne as his girlfriend, felicitating his own museum and approval from a disguised Metro Man.
    

Megamind

Don't Look Up

This Place Rules


            Morton Schmidt (Jonah Hill) and Greg Jenko (Channing Tatum) are former classmates who meet again at police academy. Schmidt was a nerd while Jenko was a jock. They end up becoming friends at the academy as they help with each others' weaknesses with Schmidt helping Jenko study and Jenko motivating Schmidt through physical activity. They graduate together as partners, but are assigned to park patrol. They catch a break when they spot a group of drug dealers and arrest their leader Domingo (DeRay Davis). However, the department is forced to release him as Jenko forgot to read the Miranda rights. The two are reassigned to a revived specialty division on 21 Jump Street.They are introduced to Captain Dickson (Ice Cube), who explains the division specializes in infiltrating high schools and that they were chosen because of their youthful appearances. Schmidt and Jenko are assigned to go back to their old high school to stop a new synthetic drug from spreading to other campuses by finding the supplier. They go undercover as brothers, living at Schmidt's parents' house, and see that their high school has changed. Jenko accidentally switches their identities and they get each others' classes. They learn the lead dealer of the drug is the popular Eric (Dave Franco), but he is not the supplier.They go to the dealing room where Eric forces them to take the drug right there and not wait. They attempt to throw it up but are unsuccessful, and they undergo the phases of the drug while talking to their P.E. teacher, Mr. Walters (Rob Riggle), and also while running track and during band practice. The mistakes that happen at the track meet causes Eric to take a liking to Schmidt.Schmidt manages to fit in with the popular kids and takes a romantic interest in Eric's friend Molly (Brie Larson), while Jenko becomes friends with the nerds in his AP Chemistry class while his teacher Ms. Griggs (Ellie Kemper) takes a sexual interest in him. Jenko discovers that his new friends secretly tap into other people's cell phones to listen into their conversations. Schmidt decides to throw a party at his house to gain Eric's complete trust and Jenko takes the opportunity to tap into Eric's phone. Despite Captain Dickson ordering them not to serve alcohol and drugs to minors, they nevertheless buy alcohol and steal confiscated marijuana. When Eric arrives with Molly and his other friends, Jenko steals Eric's phone for his friends to tap into while Schmidt fights off a rival of Eric's and earns Eric's trust.Schmidt now pretends to sell the drug for Eric but is actually giving it to Captain Dickson to be confiscated. While at Eric's house, Schmidt asks Molly out to prom while Jenko listens through Eric's phone. He also insults Jenko to Eric with Jenko listening. Schmidt and Jenko learn that Eric is making a deal soon. When Jenko spots Eric leaving school, he takes Schmidt to follow him. They see that Eric is dealing with Domingo and his gang and they follow them, but are forced to run away when Domingo spots them. Back at school, Jenko accuses Schmidt of his earlier insults, possibly ruining the case, and getting in too deep, but Schmidt brushes him off. Jenko and Schmidt get into a fight that results in them getting expelled and fired from Jump Street.Later that night, both are confronted by Eric and his friends, who want to bring them on as security after hearing about what happened with Domingo. He tells them about a deal with Domingo happening during prom where they get to meet the supplier. At prom, they are surprised to see that the supplier is Mr. Walters. When Domingo and his gang arrive, he recognizes Schmidt and Jenko as police officers, and tells two of his men to kill them. However, the two men reveal themselves as DEA Agents Tom Hanson (Johnny Depp) and Doug Penhall (Peter DeLuise), who were a part of the Jump Street program when it began. Hanson casually talks to Schmidt and Jenko during the standoff which gives Domingo the opportunity to kill him and Penhall. A gunfight ensues between Schmidt and Jenko, Mr. Walters, and Domingo and his crew. Mr. Walters and Eric escape in a limo with Molly as a hostage, with Domingo and his crew in pursuit of them in another limo. Schmidt and Jenko pursue all of them in another limo where Jenko creates a homemade chemical bomb from his knowledge in AP Chemistry to kill Domingo and his crew. They then confront Mr. Walters, who shoots at Schmidt. Jenko jumps in front of Schmidt, saving his life and getting shot in the arm in the process. In response Schmidt shoots Mr. Walters in the groin, severing his penis. The duo successfully arrest him and Eric and make amends with each other. Schmidt makes amends with Molly and the two share a kiss. They are rehired into Jump Street where Dickson gives them a new assignment in a college setting, to Schmidt's excitement but to Jenko's dismay.
    

21 Jump Street


            January 2008, AlbaniaTwo masked men pull David Packouz (Miles Teller) out of a trunk and start beating him. One of the men holds a gun to David's face. We hear David's voice saying what kind of gun it is, and he adds that he is an international arms dealer.We see clips of American soldiers posing with the gear and weapons. David says that while some people see a hero serving his country, he sees thousands of dollars worth of materials. According to David, that's what war is really all about: money. Anyone who says otherwise is in on it and is supposed to keep quiet.The scene then switches to the year 2005 in Miami, Florida. David is a massage therapist making $75 an hour, living with his girlfriend Iz (Ana De Armas). On the side, David tries to sell bedsheets to a retirement home, but he learns that "no one gives a shit about old people".At a funeral, David reunites with an old friend named Efraim Diveroli (Jonah Hill). They hang out after and try to score some weed from neighborhood drug dealers. Efraim gives them $300 for weed, but they pocket the money and ignore Efraim, showing off a gun to make him leave. Efraim walks to his car and pulls out a bigger gun from his trunk, which he starts firing off in the air to scare the dealers away.David and Efraim discuss Efraim's new line of business - gunrunning. He explains to David how to exploit the war on terrorism for profit. David doesn't want to get involved at first, but when he learns Iz is pregnant, he figures he needs to make more money than he does now. He lies to her and tells her that he and Efraim are selling bedsheets to the U.S. army, which she is okay with.After learning the ins and outs of arms dealing and checking through government contracts, David and Efraim start up their own business, AEY Inc, after getting funding from Ralph Slutzky (Kevin Pollak). Soon, the guys earn themselves a contract with the United States Department of Defense to deal weapons. However, they hit a snag when they have Berettas shipped to Jordan, unaware of Italian-made guns not being permitted to be shipped.Efraim interrupts David during a dinner party with Iz and her friends. They have a conversation outside, but Iz overhears their business and learns the truth about what David is doing, leaving her pissed.David and Efraim travel to Jordan and meet with smugglers that will help them retrieve the guns. They meet a man named Marlboro (Shaun Toub), who drives the guys to their destination. They stop to get gas in Fallujah, where the guys wake up and don't see Marlboro. Efraim finds a dead body inside the station, and sees that Marlboro is siphoning gas. David gets a call from Iz, who appears to forgive David for lying to her, even though the lying does bother her. Moments later, the guys see vans approaching, with men firing guns at them. David and Efraim try to get out of there, despite having an empty tank. Marlboro runs after them and hops onto the truck, filling up the tank as they drive. The guys are saved when a U.S. chopper descends, forcing the mercenaries to stop shooting.The guys meet with Captain Santos (Patrick St. Esprit) to deliver the guns. He commends them for driving through the Triangle of Death, and the guys receive their payment.Pretty soon, the guys are making more money and earning more contracts. They start hiring people to work for AEY, and they start doing business with a man named Henry Girard (Bradley Cooper), who is apparently a legend with closing big deals with the army. David and Iz also welcome a baby girl named Ella. However, Efraim becomes increasingly megalomaniacal, even firing one man on the spot just for correcting him on something.David and Efraim then score "The Afghan Deal", which would allow them to supply the Afghan army with a number of weapons and ammunition. The contract came from China, which is a problem because the U.S. army has an embargo on the Chinese military industry, so Chinese ammunition is banned. Efraim has the ammo and weapons repackaged and shipped off anyway.The guys have a falling out with their business when David and Efraim sort out their share of the payment. When David calls Efraim out on screwing people over, Efraim has the two men from the opening of the movie kidnap David and assault him. David breaks off his partnership with Efraim, especially after Efraim refuses to pay David and Ralph back for thousands of money owed to both of them. David decides to just go back to being a massage therapist.David gets a call from a reporter regarding an investigation into the Afghan Deal. He knows he's in trouble. He heads down an elevator and meets Efraim in there. Efraim tries to make it look like he's sorry and that he considers David a friend, but David sees through the facade, which Efraim admits. David punches Efraim in the face. When they get downstairs, they are greeted by a whole team of FBI agents, and the two are arrested.As the film comes to and end, David's voice-over says that Ralph was in on it with the FBI, but he gets apprehended as well. What did them in, however, was the packaging guy that Efraim never paid, so he ratted them out. Both men were charged with conspiracy and fraud. Efraim was sentenced to four years in prison, while David served seven months house arrest, allowing him to stay with Iz and Ella.The last scene has David meeting with Henry. He starts asking a bunch of questions regarding their deals, until Henry pulls out a case full of money, which he offers to David on the promise of "no more questions."
    

War Dogs


            Following their success in the 21 Jump Street program, Schmidt (Jonah Hill) and Jenko (Channing Tatum) are back on the streets chasing narcotics. However, after failing in the pursuit of a group of drug dealers led by Ghost (Peter Stormare), Deputy Chief Hardy (Nick Offerman) puts the duo back on the program to work for Captain Dickson (Ice Cube) - now located across the street at 22 Jump Street. Their assignment is to go undercover as college students and locate the supplier of a drug known as "WHYPHY" (WiFi) that killed a student photographed buying it on campus.At college, Jenko quickly makes friends with a pair of jocks named Zook (Wyatt Russell) and Rooster (Jimmy Tatro), the latter being a prime suspect of the investigation. Jenko starts attending parties with the jocks who do not take as kindly to Schmidt. Meanwhile, Schmidt gets the attention of an art student, Maya (Amber Stevens), by feigning an interest in slam poetry. The two sleep together, to the disapproval of Maya's roommate Mercedes (Jillian Bell), and it is revealed that Maya is the daughter of the vehemently disapproving Captain Dickson. Despite sleeping together, Maya tells Schmidt not to take it seriously, and he starts to feel left out as Jenko bonds more and more with Zook who encourages him to join the football team.Schmidt and Jenko visit Mr. Walters (Rob Riggle) and Eric (Dave Franco) in jail for advice on how to look for the WHYPHY supplier. Walters notices a unique tattoo on the arm of the dealer in the photograph and insists that if they find the tattoo, they will have found their man. Whilst hanging out with Zook and Rooster, Jenko notices that Rooster does not have the tattoo but sees it on Zook's arm. Schmidt and Jenko are invited to join the fraternity led by the jocks but Schmidt refuses, furthering the tension between the two. At a counselling session, they realise that perhaps Zook was buying the drugs rather than selling them, and soon after find Ghost and his men on campus. A chase ensues and Ghost again evades the pair. Jenko reveals to Schmidt that he's been offered a football scholarship with Zook and is unsure whether or not he wants to continue to be a police officer. Schmidt decides for him by telling officers on the scene that Jenko had nothing to do with the melee caused by the chase. Immediately afterwards, Schmidt moves out of the dorm and Maya finds out who he really is.Spring Break arrives and Schmidt prepares to go after Ghost alone. Jenko asks to help so that the two can have one final mission together, and the pair head to the beach where Ghost is likely to be dealing WHYPHY. Inside a bar, they find Mercedes, revealed to be Ghost's daughter, giving instructions to other dealers. The pair, backed up by Dickson, ambush the meeting and give chase as they flee. Mercedes is able to handcuff Dickson and take him hostage, pursued by Schmidt. Meanwhile, Jenko goes after Ghost. After a fist fight with Mercedes, Schmidt is held at gunpoint by her but Maya sneaks up and knocks her out. Schmidt goes to help Jenko who is now on the roof of the college in pursuit of Ghost, who shoots Jenko in the shoulder. Ghost attempts to escape in a helicopter and Jenko jumps across to it but struggles to hold on with his injured arm. Schmidt makes the same jump and the two fall into the sea, but not before Jenko is able to throw a grenade into the helicopter, killing Ghost.Back on land, Jenko tells Schmidt that he still wants to be a police officer as he believes their differences help their partnership, and the two reconcile in front of a cheering crowd. Dickson approaches them claiming to have a new mission undercover at a med school. During the credits, a series of mock sequels and vignettes are shown depicting the two going undercover in various places.
    

22 Jump Street


            The last day Portland slacker John Callahan is able to walk, he wakes up without a hangover - because he's still drunk from the night before. That night at a wild party he meets a wisecracking drinking buddy (Jack Black), who insists they leave for an even better party he knows about. But when his new friend dozes off at the wheel, John wakes up confined to a wheelchair with only partial use of his arms. Though he initially has no intention of getting sober, he reluctantly attends a 12-step meeting run by a charismatic and dedicated sponsor named Donnie (Jonah Hill) and reconnects with Annu (Rooney Mara), a therapist he met at the hospital. With their encouragement, John discovers a hidden talent for drawing, channeling his impish personality into crude, politically incorrect - and often hilarious -cartoons, which develop a national following and grant him a new lease on life.Based on a true story, this poignant, insightful, funny drama about redemption, forgiveness and the healing power of art is adapted from Callahan's autobiography and directed by two-time Oscar nominee Gus Van Sant (Milk, Good Will Hunting). The film stars Oscar nominees Joaquin Phoenix (Her, Walk the Line), Jonah Hill (The Wolf of Wall Street, Moneyball) and Rooney Mara (Carol, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo), as well as Jack Black (Bernie, School of Rock), Carrie Brownstein ("Portlandia," "Transparent"), Beth Ditto and Kim Gordon.
The film is produced by Oscar winner Steve Golin (Spotlight, The Revenant), Charles-Marie Anthonioz (Spring Breakers, One More Time with Feeling), Mourad Belkeddar (Heaven Knows What, One More Time with Feeling) and Nicolas Lhermitte (Heaven Knows What, One More Time with Feeling). Executive producer is Brett Cranford (Night Moves, The Wait). Director of photography is Christopher Blauvelt (Certain Women, The Bling Ring). Production design is by Jahmin Assa (Mid '90s). Costume designer is Oscar nominee Danny Glicker (Up in the Air, Milk). Editors are David Marks and Gus Van Sant. Music is composed by Oscar nominee Danny Elfman (Milk, Good Will Hunting).
    

Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot

10 Items or Less


            Jay Baruchel arrives in Los Angeles to visit with old friend and fellow actor Seth Rogen, who invites Baruchel to attend a housewarming party hosted by James Franco. At the raucous party, many celebrities and others drink, take drugs, have sex, and commit other immoral acts. Baruchel is uncomfortable being around many people he does not know well including Jonah Hill, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Michael Cera, Craig Robinson, and Emma Watson and Rogen accompanies him to a convenience store for cigarettes.Beams of blue light from the sky suddenly carry away several store customers. The frightened Rogen and Baruchel flee to Franco's home amid explosions, vehicular crashes, and mass chaos, but find the party undisturbed by the blue beams. The partygoers scoff at Baruchel's account, but rush outside because of a powerful earthquake and see the Hollywood Hills on fire. A large crack opens in the earth, and Cera, Mintz-Plasse, Rihanna, Mindy Kaling, Aziz Ansari, Kevin Hart, Jason Segel, and David Krumholtz are among those killed. Rogen, Baruchel, Franco, Hill, and Robinson survive, and learn that the largest earthquake in California history has struck Los Angeles. Believing that as famous actors they will soon be rescued, the five take inventory of the available supplies, including food and water, various drugs, and a pistol. They set up a ration system, board up the doors and windows, and await help.The next morning, Danny McBride who, unknown to the others, crashed the party and fell asleep wakes up first. Ignorant of the crisis he wastes much of the supplies, and disbelieves the others' accounts until a desperate outsider seeking aid is decapitated in their presence. The men pass the time by taking many drugs and filming a homemade sequel to the 2008 film Pineapple Express, which most of the group had appeared in. Tensions rise, however, due to various conflicts, including Baruchel and Rogen's growing estrangement, and the others' skepticism of Baruchel's belief that the disasters might be the Apocalypse the Book of Revelation predicts.An armed Watson returns and reports mysterious animal noises. Due to a misunderstanding she quickly leaves, taking all of the drinks. Robinson is chosen to travel outside to the cellar for water, but is frightened by something monstrous. The group successfully reaches the water but McBride's boorish behavior results in much being lost, and the others decide to evict him. McBride tries to kill the others with the pistol but fails as the gun is a prop, and angrily leaves the home.Robinson's experience causes him to believe in Baruchel's theory of the Apocalypse and that the blue beams have, as part of the Rapture, taken good people to Heaven. He volunteers to explore a neighboring home for supplies with Baruchel. Hill secretly wishes for Baruchel to die, and is subsequently raped by an incubus. Now demonically possessed and supernaturally strong, Hill chases Franco and Rogen, while Robinson and Baruchel flee a demonic bull. The group subdues Hill, but during an exorcism attempt, a fire destroys the home and Hill's body, forcing the four outdoors.Regretful for the mistakes in his life that kept him from Heaven, Robinson volunteers to sacrifice himself so his friends can escape a large winged demon. The plan succeeds but, unexpectedly, Robinson is taken in the Rapture because of his good deed, giving hope to the group. When cannibals led by McBride capture the men, Franco similarly volunteers to sacrifice himself. Although the plan succeeds and a blue beam begins to take Franco, his taunting sneers to McBride cause the beam to vanish, and the cannibals eat Franco. As Satan is about to consume Rogen and Baruchel, they reaffirm their friendship and await death. A blue beam suddenly strikes Baruchel, who tries to pull Rogen up with him, but together they are failing to reach Heaven. Rogen lets go to allow his friend to ascend, and just before being killed is also taken by the Rapture.Robinson, now an angel, welcomes Baruchel and Rogen in Heaven. He explains that it is a paradise where any wish comes true. Baruchel wishes that the Backstreet Boys would reunite, and the film ends with the band performing "Everybody (Backstreet's Back)" for a raucous heavenly party.
    

This Is the End


            Graduating high school senior Bartleby "B" Gaines (Justin Long) finds himself without a college to attend. He has been able to talk and con his way out of every problem he encounters, but he hasn't been able to charm his way pass the college admissions board of eight colleges. His mom and dad are very disappointed that Bartleby hasn't been accepted into college. His parents think that if Bartleby doesn't go to college, he will have no future. Several of Bartleby's friends are in the same situation of being rejected by all the colleges they applied to. To satisfy their parents, Bartleby comes up with an idea to start his own college with an internet site. They convert an abandoned psychiatric facility into the South Harmon Institute of Technology. They will be the only students. However, the web site states that we accept anyone. On the first day of school, they unexpectedly have a large number of accepted students that were also rejected by all colleges. With a million dollars in tuition money, Bartleby must make his fake college into a functioning one. He hires Uncle Ben (Lewis Black) as the College Dean. The fun begins when they design their own curriculum, make their own rules, and party all night.
The fun will eventually end when the South Hamon jocks will ruin all the work that B and his friends have accomplished, Douglas Young (the-movie-guy)
    

Accepted

Cyrus


            Christian Longo (James Franco), an Oregon man whose wife and three children have been discovered murdered, is arrested by police in Mexico, where he had been identifying himself as a reporter for the New York Times named Michael Finkel.In New York City, Michael Finkel (Jonah Hill) is an ambitious and successful reporter. He is confronted by his editors about a story he has written which featured on the cover of the New York Times Magazine. They accuse him of using a composite character as the focus of his story, a violation of basic reporting principles. Finkel briefly attempts to defend his actions, but he is unsuccessful and is fired. He returns home to his wife Jill (Felicity Jones), and struggles to find work as a journalist due to his public firing from the Times.Finkel is contacted by a reporter for The Oregonian,seeking his opinion on Christian Longo's assumption of his identity. Finkel, who was unaware of Longo's case, is intrigued, and arranges to meet Longo in prison. During their first conversation, Longo claims he has followed Finkel's entire career and always admired his writing. Longo agrees to tell Finkel his side of the crimes he is accused of, in exchange for writing lessons and Finkel's promise not to share their conversations until after the conclusion of the murder trial.Finkel becomes increasingly absorbed with Longo, who is likeable but evasive about his guilt. Convinced the story will be redemptive, Finkel visits Longo in prison and corresponds with him for several months. Longo sends Finkel numerous letters as well as an 80-page notebook entitled "Wrong Turns" which contains what Longo describes as a list of every mistake he has made in his life. Finkel begins to recognize similarities between Longo and himself, their handwriting and drawing, and Longo's letters and Finkel's personal journals. As the trial approaches, Finkel grows increasingly doubtful Longo is guilty of the murders, and Longo informs Finkel he intends changing his plea to not guilty.In court, Longo pleads not guilty to two of the murders, but pleads guilty to the murder of his wife and one of his daughters. Finkel confronts Longo, who claims he cannot share everything he knows, because he has to protect certain individuals who he refuses to name. Greg Ganley (Robert John Burke), the detective who tracked Longo down and arrested him, approaches Finkel and claims Longo is an extremely dangerous and manipulative man. He tries to convince Finkel to turn over as evidence all his correspondence with Longo. Finkel refuses and Ganley does not press him for an explanation.At the trial, Longo takes the stand and describes his version of the events in detail. He claims he had, after an argument with his wife about their financial situation, come home to discover two of his children missing, one of his daughters unconscious, and his wife sobbing, saying she put the children "in the water". Longo says he strangled his wife to death in a blind rage. He says he thought his other daughter was dead at first, but then realized she was still breathing and strangled her as well because she was all but dead. Finkel's wife, Jill, watches Longo's testimony.As the jury deliberates, Jill visits Longo in jail and tells him he is a narcissistic murderer who will never escape who he is.Longo is found guilty of all four charges and sentenced to death. After he is sentenced, he winks at Finkel, who, to his shock and rage, realizes Longo has been lying throughout their conversations, using him in order to make his testimony more believable. A short time later, Finkel meets Longo on death row. Longo tries to convince Finkel he discovered his wife strangling their daughter and then blacked out, so he has no memory of the murders. Finkel angrily tells Longo he will not believe any more of his lies and will warn the judge, when Longo appeals against his sentence, of Longo's manipulative nature. Longo retorts by pointing out the success Finkel has had with his book about their encounters, leaving the reporter shaken.Finkel reads a section of his book, entitled True Story, at a promotional event in a bookstore. Taking questions from the audience, he imagines Longo standing in the back of the room. Longo says if he has lost his freedom, Finkel must have lost something as well. Finkel is unable to respond.Title cards reveal Longo admitted, a year later, to killing his entire family. Finkel never wrote for the "New York Times" again, but Longo has contributed articles to a number of publications from death row, including the "New York Times." The final title card says Finkel and Longo still speak on the first Sunday of every month.
    

True Story


            Mark Bellison (Ricky Gervais) is a loser about to lose his job as a screenwriter at a very successful production company, Lecture Films. He also has a lifelong crush over the perfect girl, beautiful Anna McDoogles (Jennifer Garner), but she doesn't want a fat, snub-nosed loser as her husband. That would ruin her chances to have perfect genetically beautiful, pretty babies. The setting for the story is somewhat odd. Nobody can actually lie about anything, they don't even know about the word as its not invented yet. Mark is about to get thrown out of his apartment for his inability to pay the rent. So, he goes to the bank to withdraw all his cash. But, there's a technical glitch in the computers and they ask the amount he has to withdraw from his account. He asks for $800 instead of $300 and the systems are back on. But, the lady says there must be a mistake as the system shows $300 and she gives him $800 thinking the system is corrupt! Here inadvertently, Mark invents the art of lying. He is the first person ever to lie and its as easy as drinking water to him and everybody believes whatever he says. His Mom gets sick, and he makes up a story about an afterlife to help comfort his Mom on her deathbed. Doctors and nurses overhear him, and soon Mark becomes an international authority on the afterlife. People camp on his lawn to learn more. Mark develops a story about the "Man in the Sky," who functions like God, and he pastes his theology on two pizza boxes like Moses and the Ten Commandments. Using his new-found power, he sways his old company and becomes rich and famous. He gets his girl, finally, and marries her.
    

The Invention of Lying


            Rock star Aldous Snow (Russell Brand) releases an album and an accompanying single "African Child". The song and music video flops, is banned and called "the worst thing to happen to Africa since the apartheid" by NME. His girlfriend, Jackie Q (Rose Byrne), takes custody of their son, Naples, and leaves him; as a result, Aldous hits rock bottom by drinking and doing drugs excessively once again.Meanwhile, in Los Angeles, Aaron Green (Jonah Hill) is a driven, idealistic young college graduate who works as a low-level talent scout at Pinnacle Records. He lives with his girlfriend, Daphne (Elisabeth Moss), a doctor in her internship, but they do not get to see each other often due to her heavy work schedule. Pinnacle Records has lost a lot of money, so the head of the company, Sergio Roma (Sean "Diddy" Combs), asks for ideas. Green proposes to have Aldous Snow play at the Greek Theatre in Los Angeles for the tenth anniversary of a particularly famous performance there. One month later, he sends Aaron to London to retrieve Aldous. Before leaving, Aaron visits sleep-deprived Daphne at her hospital to tell her that he'll be gone for a few days. She informs Aaron that she received a job offer at a hospital in Seattle, where she will have a less hectic work schedule. Aaron doesn't appreciate her insisting that they move to Seattle and leave their current jobs behind, and an argument ensues and leads to an implied break-up.After retrieving Aldous from his apartment, Aaron tries desperately to control Aldous' rambunctious behavior, which causes them to miss several flights. They bar-hop across the city for several hours, leaving a trail of women and alcohol in their wake. Daphne calls him to apologize for the fight, but Aaron already believes that they had broken up. Throughout this partying, buttons on Aaron's cell phone (placed in his pocket) accidentally call his girlfriend, and his girlfriend overhears him partying with other women.Once the two have made it to New York, they proceed to Aldous' Welcome Back performance on Today. Aaron receives word from Sergio to keep Aldous sober for his performance, and Aaron consumes all of Aldous' alcohol and marijuana on the way to the program. Minutes before the performance, Aldous realizes that he is unable to remember the lyrics to his favorite song, "African Child", shortly after Aaron had admitted to "African Child" being his least favorite Infant Sorrow song. Placing resentment and blame on Aaron, he sends him on a frenzy of drunk desperation in search of the lyrics. Aaron is unable to complete this task, and after the first few bars of "African Child", Aldous stops his band, and plays one of his older hits called "The Clap" to cheers and excitement from the audience. Aaron had also mentioned earlier that "The Clap" is his personal favorite.While preparing to fly to Los Angeles, Aldous forces Aaron to smuggle heroin in his anus. During their travels and time in London and New York, Aaron learns that Aldous has become miserable and lonely, as he misses his son and has not seen any signs of genuine love from his own dad in years. Aaron shares his relationship troubles, and Aldous encourages him to enjoy his time in Los Angeles. Giving advice to Aldous, Aaron suggests he visits Jackie Q and his father and so the two make a stop in Las Vegas the night prior to the show to see Aldous's father. Sergio also arrives, wanting to help oversee the final proceedings. Sergio hooks up Aaron with a ditzy, sexually rambunctious girl named Destiny (Carla Gallo), who takes him to a room, shows him her pubic hair and rapes him. During this, his phone against accidentally calls his Daphne and she hears an out-of-context sample of what is going on. After Aaron tells Aldous that he has been raped, the other men laugh it off, and they encourage him to smoke a "Geoffrey", a joint which is eventually described as "a Neapolitan of drugs". Upon being told about the extra ingredients in the Geoffrey, Aaron panics and starts believing he is having a heart attack (he is actually just having a bad trip). Aldous' father repeatedly says that it is a heart attack, making the trip worse, whilst Aldous repeatedly attempts to calm Aaron down by telling him "to stroke the furry wall". Aldous has a fight with his father; Sergio jumps in the fight (also high on Geoffrey), and their tussle ends up setting the hotel room on fire. Aldous attempts to help Aaron with an adrenaline shot to the heart and they run out of the hotel, chased by Sergio who is then hit by a car.Aldous and Aaron are driven to Los Angeles, where Snow visits Jackie Q. She has been sleeping with Metallica's drummer, Lars Ulrich (playing himself) - and is apparently engaged to him, and confesses to Aldous that Naples is not actually his biological son. This depresses him even further. Meanwhile, Aaron goes to his home to apologize to Daphne. The are interrupted when Aldous Snow comes to their house and becomes involved in the conversation. Snow proposes that he, Aaron, and Daphne engage in a threesome because Aaron had been with other women during his time with Aldous Snow. During the threesome, resentful Aaron angrily decides to kiss Aldous, eventually ending the threesome. Daphne feels horrible about the threesome, and storms out of the room. Aaron angrily tells Aldous to go, and criticizes Aldous' overall mental state.Instead of preparing for his show, Aldous goes to the rooftop of the Standard Hotel in Downtown Los Angeles, and calls Aaron, threatening to jump. Aaron rushes to the hotel rooftop pool in an attempt to coax Aldous down from the roof. Aldous attempts to jump down to the pool instead of killing himself, and accidentally shatters his arm against the poolside. Aldous tells Aaron that he is lonely and feels unconnected to people. Aaron tells Aldous that he is trying too hard, and that thousands of fans love him and are waiting just to see his face. Aldous, inspired by Aaron's words, decides to go and perform at the Greek theatre. Aaron tries to take him to the hospital, but Aldous insists on making it to his performance at the Greek. Upon his arrival, Sergio attempts to offer Aaron drugs to give to Aldous to ease the pain he is in. Aaron angrily refuses and quits his job on the spot. He walks stage-side with Aldous, trying to convince him one last time to go to the hospital instead. However, Aaron sees how happy Aldous is performing and allows him to continue while he himself goes home and reconciles with his girlfriend. Months later in Seattle (where Aaron and his girlfriend have moved), a healthier and sober Aldous Snow has returned to fame with a single produced by Aaron based on events from their night in Las Vegas, performing on the VH1 Storytellers program.
    

Get Him to the Greek


            The film starts with a Facetime chat between 32-year-old Laird Mayhew (James Franco) and his 22-year-old college girlfriend Stephanie Fleming (Zoey Deutch). She invites him to come over to "Netflix and chill". Laird gets excited and starts naming Netflix shows as he points the phone's camera down toward his groin.In Grand Rapids, Michigan, Stephanie's younger 15-year-old brother Scotty (Griffin Gluck) puts on a slideshow at an Applebee's in honor of their dad Ned's (Bryan Cranston) 55th birthday. Ned's wife/the kids' mother Barb (Megan Mullaly) and some of Ned's coworkers are in attendance. Scotty arranges for Stephanie to pop in via webcam, just as Laird walks into her room. He takes his pants off and exposes his bare ass to everyone. Scotty frantically tries to shut the feed off, but he accidentally freezes it on a shot of Laird's ass. Ned just grabs the laptop and smashes it when the restaurant employees come in to sing "Happy Birthday".Ned is the CEO of a printing company that has been having a rough year. The company is in debt and is unable to close deals with other companies due to the lack of demand for printing. Ned talks to his coworker Lou Dunne (Cedric The Entertainer) about the incident from the previous night. Ned tells Lou that Stephanie wants the rest of the family to meet Laird who lives outside of San Jose, California, even though Stephanie never even mentioned having a boyfriend up until that night.On December 22, Ned and family arrive in San Jose where they meet Stephanie at the airport who then drives her family to Laird's house, which is surprisingly huge. She explains to Ned that Laird is the CEO of a video game company, meaning he's super rich. They arrive at the house, and the eccentric Laird greets the family as "the motherfucking Flemings!" They also meet Laird's right-hand man Gustav (Keegan-Michael Key), who acts as the voice of reason to Laird. Laird gives the family a tour of his house, complete with curse words and overly complimenting Barb's looks in front of Ned. He even shows off a back tattoo that he got of the Flemings' Christmas card, with "Happy Holidays" written on the bottom. In the living room is a tank with a moose filled completely with its urine. The basement has a bowling alley that Laird built with a mural of Ned, complete with a "crotch-chop" pose of his.Ned talks to Stephanie about Laird's behavior, which she knew he would bring up. She asks Ned to give him a chance.During dinner, Laird starts talking about times that he and Stephanie have had sex, in full and graphic details. She later tells him that he is making her parents uncomfortable, so Laird vows to be better for her.That evening, Laird enters Ned and Barb's bedroom and apologizes to for making them uncomfortable. He then introduces them to his Siri-like voice system called Justine (Kaley Cuoco), who is there to accommodate Laird and his guests.The next morning, Ned tries to use the bathroom, but unfortunately, Laird has declared his home a "paper-free" zone, so Ned has to clean himself with an automated toilet. Gustav tries to help Ned clean himself, but it just becomes complicated.Laird invites Ned to go out for a walk in the woods outside his house. He brings Ned to a tepee so that he can ask Ned for his blessing to propose to Stephanie. Ned is quick to say no, which completely blindsides Laird since he was confident Ned would say yes. Laird promises to win him over so that he can get his blessing, but he also asks to keep it a secret from everyone, including Barb and Scotty.Later, Laird bonds with Scotty as the boy tries out Laird's new video games and gives him feedback, while also talking business with him since Ned has been grooming Scotty to take over his business. Meanwhile, Barb encounters someone with a vape pen, and she gets really high. She later tries to get Ned to come onto her, but he refuses.Ned contacts his co-worker Kevin Dingle (Zack Pearlman) to dig up some dirt on Laird. Dingle tries to hack into Laird's personal content, only for him to get hacked back by an anti-hacking program that Laird installed, causing all of Dingle's power to crash. He tells Ned to try and break into Laird's personal computer by trying to figure out his password. Dingle assumes it must be something dirty ("StephaniesBoobs" for example), but Ned is surprised when he finds the only piece of paper in the house with a password that says "StephaniesDude" (which he actually thinks is sweet). Before Ned can read too much, Laird and Stephanie both walk into his office and talk about how Laird has been acting. He apologizes and tries to get her to have sex. Instead, she lets him go down on her, which Ned is forced to listen to as he hides under Laird's desk.The following evening, Laird decides to throw a Christmas Eve party for the Flemings. He sends invites to some of his fellow entrepreneur buddies. Ned meets a pair of siblings that run a company that is something of a rival to Ned's company. Ned makes a comment that he feels "bukkake" after hearing Laird use it in the sense that he is feeling overwhelmed, only to be told by everybody else that it literally means "jizz in your face."The family gathers in Laird's living room for the party. Ned takes the chance to tell everyone that Laird is in debt since his company hasn't been doing so well. Laird then reveals that he bought Ned's company as a gift to remove all his debts. Instead of expressing gratitude, Ned punches Laird in the face. The two start fighting childishly (Ned bites Laird's dick), and Laird runs to the top of the moose tank. The glass beneath his feet breaks and he falls in. Scotty runs over to break Laird out, but the tank breaks completely and sends moose urine all over the place. The moose itself is on top of Scotty, and its balls are on his face. Stephanie and Barb are both pissed at the men's behavior, and the family leaves Laird's home. Ned, Barbara and Scotty then return to Michigan.Upon returning to work, Ned finds that all of his employees are celebrating Laird's purchase of the company since their jobs are now safe. They get him an iPad as a gift, which has a wallpaper of him and Laird from the bowling alley, making Ned feel guilty.On Christmas Day, the Flemings are celebrating without Stephanie. They are surprised when Laird's helicopter comes down to the middle of the street since he wanted to surprise Stephanie and bring her home for Christmas. She is still mad at both Ned and Laird for their behavior around her, and she goes inside the house. Ned and Laird have a talk, since Laird still wants to propose but won't do so until he officially gets Ned's blessing. Laird also reveals that he got doves and another special surprise as part of the proposal, but Ned says that Stephanie doesn't like the flashy stuff and that she loves Laird for who he is. He finally gives Laird his blessing. Ned goes inside to talk to Stephanie and get her to talk to Laird. Through a miscommunication, Ned tries to call off the surprises, but Gustav thinks it's still a go. He sets the doves free and also brings out Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley of KISS to come out and play "I Was Made For Lovin' You". Laird tells the two to go inside the Fleming house while he proposes.Moments later, Laird and Stephanie go inside the house. Laird tells Ned that Stephanie declined the proposal because she's just not ready to get married, but she still wants to continue dating Laird.Later during the party, Ned and Scotty approach Laird for a new business idea since they are all part of the same company now. Scotty says they should sell the same toilets Laird has in his home since they would be very profitable. Laird likes the idea and agrees. The couples then dance together as music plays, with Ned referring to Laird as "son".
    

Why Him?


            The film opens at the supermarket Shopwell's on a new day as customers are rolling in. The food there live in their own world where they greet each morning with a song about "The Great Beyond", where the "gods" (shoppers) take the food to their ultimate destiny.A pack of sausages and a bag of buns are placed next to each other during a 4th of July weekend sale. Frank (voice of Seth Rogen) is a sausage that wants to finally get all up in his bun girlfriend Brenda (voice of Kristen Wiig). He shares the pack with his buddies Carl (voice of Jonah Hill) and Barry (voice of Michael Cera). Barry is the smallest sausage and is mocked by Troy (voice of Anders Holm) and his pals. All the sausages and buns think they are destined to get together in The Great Beyond. For now, Frank and Brenda can only touch tips. They then witness one of the store's employees, Darren (voice of Paul Rudd), whom the food refer to as "the dark lord", coming around and throwing out all the expired food, despite the food pleading and insisting that they are still good.Later in the day, Honey Mustard (voice of Danny McBride) gets returned to Shopwell's. He is trembling in fear and appears traumatized, unable to speak about what he has just seen. As this happens, a shopper named Camille Toh (voice of Lauren Miller-Rogen) picks up the sausages and buns, and then Honey Mustard. While the rest of the food in the cart is celebrating being chosen, Honey Mustard stands up and tells the food that everything they have been led to believe about the gods and The Great Beyond is a bunch of bullshit. He says that the gods are preparing them for unspeakable horrors. Refusing to go back, Honey Mustard gets ready to leap off the cart. Frank gets out of his package and runs to catch him, leading Brenda to leave her bag to save Frank. Before falling, Honey Mustard tells Frank to seek out Firewater (voice of Bill Hader) to learn the answers he seeks. Another shopper then bumps his cart into Camille's, causing Honey Mustard to fall and crash. Several other products fall and become damaged. Banana's face peels off, Jelly gets splattered, a bag of chips gets popped and his chips slice the other food, and a can of noodles has his guts spill out.Frank and Brenda escape the chaos, but the store is now closed and they're away from their packages. They run into a douche named...Douche (voice of Nick Kroll), who's pissed that his nozzle is bent and therefore he cannot fulfill his purpose to have a woman use him. Douche tries to come at Frank and Brenda, but Darren sweeps him up into the garbage.Douche climbs out of the garbage bin and finds that his side is cracked, causing his juices to leak. He cries about not getting to do what he's made for. Douche then spots a broken grape juice box. He goes over to it and is then inspired to seek out revenge on Frank and Brenda. Douche drinks out of the box's crotch and gets juiced up, ready to get payback.Frank and Brenda head back to their aisles and meet the Armenian flatbread Lavash (voice of David Krumholtz) and Jewish Sammy Bagel, Jr (voice of Edward Norton). The two of them hate each other, as their food groups are made to believe they should. The four of them discover the aisles that form a city in the grocery store. Frank spots the liquor aisle and decides to seek out Firewater. They head down that aisle, and Frank finds Firewater's spot. He leaves Brenda with Lavash and Sammy as he goes to talk to Firewater.Frank encounters Firewater sitting around a fire. Frank asks him what Honey Mustard was talking about. Firewater explains that once the food goes out the door, the gods kill their asses. Thinking Frank has heard too much, Firewater puts a bag over his head and prepares to have him killed, but one of his friends talks him out of it. Frank then meets the Non-Perishables, which also include Mr. Grits (voice of Craig Robinson) and Twink (voice of Scott Underwood).Brenda goes looking for Frank and runs into Tequila (also Bill Hader), who says he knows where to find Frank. He takes Brenda, Lavash, and Sammy to a pub in the Mexican food aisle. Teresa Del Taco (voice of Salma Hayek) sees Brenda and becomes smitten with her. However, she knows that the three are being brought in for a trap. Teresa hides them as Douche arrives. He smashes Tequila and drinks his fluids, getting even more juiced up. Teresa leads the food out a secret passageway.Frank sits with the Non-Perishables as they smoke sativa from their pipe. Firewater admits that because they are Non-Perishable, and therefore immortal, they have seen the barbaric nature of the gods long before the rest of the food in the store, knowing full well what awaits them once they are out the doors. So, they made up the tale of the gods being saviors so that the next wave of food would leave the store happy instead of terrified. Firewater says they also made up the song (he made the tune, Twink made the lyrics), but other food have changed up the meaning to their liking, which upsets Firewater. Frank decides he has to warn everyone about what awaits them. Firewater tells him to go down the Dark Aisle in order to find the proof that he needs to get the food to realize what is really happening.At Camille's house, all the food is excited to see what they are in for. Camille picks out Potato (voice of Greg Tiernan) first. He is elated and thinks he is about to enter eternity...until Camille starts peeling his skin off, and then drops him into a pot of boiling water. The food then become horrified when a tomato gets chopped in half, a lettuce head is split in two, cheese is grated and microwaved onto nachos, and bacon is fried alive! Two little baby carrots try rolling away to freedom, but Camille catches them and eats them. Carl and Barry make a run for it out the window. They prepare to jump into the bushes when Camille sticks a knife through Carl and slices him upwards. Barry avoids the same fate as he falls into the bushes.Brenda, Teresa, Lavash, and Sammy walk down the back of the aisle. Brenda thinks all the bad stuff is happening because she and Frank touched tips, and now the gods are punishing her. Teresa admits that she has urges that she cannot give into for fear of angering the gods. They are then attacked by the jacked-up Douche. He is about to kill Brenda until she rips off the sticker that kept his juices from leaking. The food manages to escape from Douche as he gets stuck in the walls.Barry is now out in the streets, scared out of his wits. He finds a turd with zombie corn, and then a used condom who laments what he was used for. Barry hides and sees a Druggie (James Franco) stopping by with a Shopwell's bag. The Druggie buys bath salts and walks away. Barry thinks the man can help him get back to Frank to warn him. He runs after the Druggie and hangs onto his shoelace as he drives home.Frank reunites with his friends and tries to get them to follow him to the dark aisle so that he can show them proof of what the gods really do with them. However, Brenda remains firm in her beliefs and feels hurt that Frank would start badmouthing the gods right now. She decides that she would rather go to The Great Beyond without Frank and gets filled with something else, like an eggplant or tube of toothpaste, to Frank's horror. Brenda returns to her aisle and tearfully parts from Teresa. Meanwhile, Lavash and Sammy discover they have a common friend with Hummus, but they remain unable to put their differences aside and return to their arguing groups.Now at the Druggie's home, Barry tries to sneak into the Shopwell's bag. The Druggie them shoots up the bath salts and starts tripping balls. This causes him to be able to see, hear, and speak to Barry, as well as the other food in his room. The Druggie freaks out when he sees the half-eaten and conscious food, as well as the mortified Toilet Paper (voice of Conrad Vernon). Barry then meets a Stephen Hawking-like wad of gum named...Gum (also Scott Underwood), who is the most intelligent being in the world, having been stuck under the desk of a brilliant scientist for decades. Gum figures out how to get Barry back to the closest Shopwell's. The Druggie agrees to help Barry get home, but first he passes out.Frank goes down the Dark Aisle and finds a big recipe book. It contains disturbing depictions of the gods chowing down on food as it is fully aware of being eaten. Frank then sees the page with a sausage and bun being eaten. He rips that page out and sets out to tell the truth.The Druggie wakes up, but the effects of the bath salts wear off and he can't understand the food anymore. He starts eating the bag of chips, and then reaches for Barry. He goes to throw him in a boiling pot of water.It is now morning, and the store is about to open. Frank gets himself on camera and speakers to talk to all the food. He tries to explain to them that the gods are going to kill them and not take them to a Great Beyond. Frank shows off the pages of the recipe book, but the food thinks he is just speaking blasphemy and making things up. Frank leaves, defeated, but then reunites with Barry. He brings with him the decapitated head of the Druggie. We see how Barry managed to miss the boiling water, leading the Druggie to try and pick him up, only to knock over the pot and burn himself. Barry grabbed his shoelace and made him slip, causing him to fall and have an axe from from the wall and chop his head off, so Barry and the rest of the Druggie's food (plus Toilet Paper). With this revelation, Frank knows someone else has witnessed the barbarity of the gods firsthand. But now that they know the gods can be killed, the food sets out to stop them once and for all.Frank sees that Brenda is about to be taken away in another package. He races to get her while Barry has the house foods cook the bath salts and dip toothpicks in them, which they shoot at the shoppers and employees. They start to trip out and see the sentient food. The lady with Brenda's package freaks out and tries to run. Frank locks the store down, causing the woman to slam into the door. She grabs Frank, but Brenda whacks her face to the ground. The food tries to get the shopper's attention, but a woman slams a pizza slice against the door. The other shoppers start smashing the food when they see it's alive. This proves to the food that the gods are monsters. They decide it's time to fight back once and for all!The candy aisle shoots gumballs at an obese man. A bottle of cola and a tube of Mentos sacrifice themselves to go down the man's throat and blow him up. Other shoppers and employees get brutally attacked by the food. Darren goes to get a gun and finds Douche speaking to him. He offers to form an alliance so they can both kill Frank. Douche jumps into Darren's pants and sticks his nozzle up Darren's ass to control him. They go hunting for Frank as Darren shoots the food. Frank is caught by Douche, who takes a bite out of him. Brenda swings down to save Frank while Barry and his friends set up a garbage bin with explosives that hurdles toward Darren and Douche. The bin snatches them up, and the food sets them up to get launched out of the store where they perish in a massive explosion.Now that the food has won, Frank and Brenda decide to do what they've been wanting to do this whole time...get all up in each other. Lavash and Sammy come out with their feelings for each other and get in on the action, along with Teresa. The whole store them has one epic orgy, including the Non-Perishables, plus Barry and a smushed bun.After all the fun, Frank and his friends are guided by Gum to Firewater's lair. He tells them of another terrible truth - all of them are just cartoons coming from the mind of Seth Rogen and his buddies. Gum shows them a machine he's built for them to head out into the real world and cut the strings loose from these puppet masters. Frank and his friends hold hands as they make the leap into another crazy new world.
    

Sausage Party


            In the town of Glenview, Ohio, Evan Trautwig (Ben Stiller) is an active participant in the community and senior manager of the local Costco store. His life is disrupted when the store's night security guard is murdered. The local police have no leads, and show no interest in investigating further. Determined to find the killer and bring him to justice, Evan decides to form a neighborhood watch. However, he only manages to recruit Bob (Vince Vaughn), a construction worker and loving father; Franklin (Jonah Hill), a high school dropout who dreams of being a police officer but failed the written, physical, and mental-health tests; and Jamarcus (Richard Ayoade), a recent divorcee.The watch members use the group as an excuse to drink and have fun (much to Evan's annoyance). While driving on patrol, they accidentally hit something. They discover a strange metallic orb that acts as a highly destructive weapon, and deduce that it is of alien origin. Meanwhile, several more townspeople are mysteriously killed. The watch responds to the murders and encounters an alien, which attacks them. Evan (apparently) kills it with a lawn gnome before the group returns with the creature to Bob's house. The creature regains consciousness and escapes, stealing the metallic orb and warning them that the aliens have already infiltrated the town. The watch theorizes that the aliens are stealing their victims' skin and disguising themselves as humans, so anyone in Glenview could be an alien. Bob confides to Evan that he is worried about his daughter Chelsea (Erin Moriarty), and does not trust her boyfriend Jason (Nicholas Braun). Evan admits that he has been avoiding his wife Abby (Rosemarie DeWitt) because he is infertile, and revealing that to her may cause her to leave.Evan suspects that one of his neighbors is an alien (due to his strange, stiff way of speaking and because he always seems to be watching him). As the watch scouts the neighbor's house, Bob learns that Chelsea is at an unsupervised party with Jason. Bob disobeys Evan's orders, and rushes to the party with Franklin. Bob prevents Jason from raping Chelsea, but Jason beats him until Franklin intervenes. Evan and Jamarcus investigate the odd neighbor alone, discovering that he (only) hosts orgies in his basement. When Bob returns, he and Evan argue over his putting his daughter above the watch. Bob is fired from the watch after saying Evan has no friends because he tries to control everything. Evan goes home and admits his infertility to Abby, who accepts the news and tells him they will work things out.Evan then receives an urgent call from Jamarcus, who confesses that he is one of the aliens but has decided to side with humanity after experiencing human culture (and oral sex). He warns the group that the aliens are building a transmitter (beneath the Costco store) which will summon their armada to destroy the earth, and is expelled from the watch for his deception. Bob, Franklin, Evan and Abby arm themselves and infiltrate the Costco to destroy the transmitter. Bob encounters Jason who reveals that he is also an alien, and they fight. Evan and Franklin attempt to disable the transmitter, but are surrounded by aliens. Jamarcus arrives and saves the pair, revealing that the aliens' brains are located in their crotch; Bob kills Jason by ripping off his penis. Evan discovers that the transmitter is powered by the metallic orb and removes it, disabling the machine. More aliens arrive, forcing the group to flee. The watch uses the metallic orb to destroy the Costco building, killing all of the aliens inside.In the epilogue, Evan and Abby rekindle their passion and adopt a daughter. Bob is closer to Chelsea and accepts her new boyfriend (who is intimidated by stories of how Bob killed Jason). Franklin is finally accepted by the Glenview Police Department, and Jamarcus continues participating in the secret neighborhood orgies. The group maintains the watch, continuing to protect Glenview from criminals (and aliens).
    

The Watch

Just Add Water


            Noah (Jonah Hill) is a college student who has been suspended and now lives with his mom. After a disagreement with her, he's lured into taking a babysitting job caring for the unruly kids of Mrs. Pedulla: the sexually confused Slater (Max Records), no-nonsense wild child Blithe (Landry Bender) and pyromaniac adoptee Rodrigo (Kevin Hernandez).Soon Noah is invited to a party to have sex with his supposed girlfriend Marisa (Ari Graynor), who uses him only to get oral sex, and she agrees to have sex with him if he brings drugs to the party. Tempted by the offer, Noah steals Mrs. Pedulla's car and takes the kids to the city, where he meets Karl (Sam Rockwell) in his body-building shop. Karl likes to hide his cocaine in expensive dinosaur eggs and loves to make new friends. After getting drugs, Noah realizes that Rodrigo has stolen an egg from Karl; after a struggle, the egg bursts open, spilling all the drugs.After he finds out the drugs are missing and calls Noah, Karl tells Noah that he has to come up with $10,000 or he will kill him. In a panic, Noah decides to take the kids back to their parents', but decides against it feeling he has to fix his own problems. He then takes the kids to the bat mitzvah party (to which Slater was invited) of a bratty popular girl who goes to school with Slater. There Slater sees his friend, Clayton (Alex Wolff), who lied to him earlier, saying that he couldn't hang out with him because his spider died. Clayton admits he lied because he was sick of hanging out with Slater at his house and not going anywhere, which hurt Slater's feelings.Noah discovers the valet service has lost his van, which was actually stolen. Noah leaves, going to his father's house to see if he will give him the money he now owes Karl. When his dad berates him and refuses to give him money, Noah steals his father's car and breaks into his father's jewelry store, taking diamonds. Rodrigo, fascinated with bombs, puts a cherry bomb in the bathroom, blowing up the store. Noah, frustrated with Rodrigo's antics, yells at him and forces him to admit why he is so bad. Believing that no one in the family likes him, a frustrated Rodrigo throws all of Slater's meds out the window.Slater has a panic attack in which Noah calms him down and acknowledges that he knows about Slater's homosexuality. Noah notices his stolen van and follows the thieves to a club where he runs across Jacolby (Method Man) and his girlfriend, who hates him because years ago Noah threw up in her grandmother's urn. Noah allows her to hit him as an apology, which she does, then makes amends. Noah runs into Roxanne (Kylie Bunbury), a girl he knew from college, and realizes she likes him.Still on the run from Karl, Noah goes to the party to save Marisa, who is drunk and belligerent. When Karl shows up, Noah, Marisa, and the kids make a run from him, crashing into a park. With Noah about to die, Jacolby and his crew come and save him, beating Karl up while Noah runs and takes the kids back home. Marisa realizes that she was a terrible girlfriend and that she got Noah in all this mess. Noah agrees, letting her know that he is done risking everything for her when she doesn't really like him.Finally Noah gets the kids home before their parents come back, cleaning up their mess. The kids all get extremely close to Noah and start to listen to him. Noah finally leaves after threatening Mr. Pedulla, acknowledging that he knows he is sleeping with his assistant, which Blithe had told him about. Roxanne meets him at the house, and they leave together, walking home hand in hand.
    

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