
            An adaptation of nine stories from Bocaccio's "Decameron": A young man from Perugia is swindled twice in Naples, but ends up rich; a man poses as a deaf-mute in a convent of curious nuns; a woman must hide her lover when her husband comes home early; a scoundrel fools a priest on his deathbed; three brothers take revenge on their sister's lover; a young girl sleeps on the roof to meet her boyfriend at night; a group of painters wait for inspiration; a crafty priest attempts to seduce his friend's wife; and two friends make a pact to find out what happen= s after death. Pasolini is up to his old tricks satirizing the Church, and throwing in liberal doses of life and love. Written by Philip Brubaker <coda@nando.net>
    

The Decameron


            
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Arabian Nights


            Two men are riding a motorcycle through the streets of Rome, Italy. It is a week or two before Christmas. Fred (Marc Porel) is at the helm and Tony (Ray Lovelock) is riding pillion. At the same time, two other men on another motorcycle cruise through the streets. This pair of men attempt to rob a woman on the sidewalk by stealing her handbag, but she refuses to let go. They drag her along the street before she rams head first into a lamppost, killing her instantly. Still unable to work the handbag free, the second biker dismounts and viciously begins to beat the dead woman to force her to give up her handbag. Fred and Tony arrive to see the two assailants fleeing. Fred takes off after the two thugs while Tony stays behind to examine the woman. Finding her dead, Tony steals another motorcycle and ride off after the thugs.A long motorcycle chase ensues through the streets as many holiday shoppers jump out of the way. The only fatality is a seeing eye dog the thugs run over, leaving the blind owner hysterical. The chase leads through a café with Fred and his target wrecking the place. Going around the café, Tony, apparently stymied by an approaching traffic jam, rides OVER the cars, damaging several of them. After a game of chicken between the four men, Fred and Tony succeed in herding their quarry at speed into the back of a garbage truck. The first thug is gruesomely impaled in the crash, while the second is propelled through the cab and out into the street, injured but alive. Fred walks over to the second thug, and suddenly breaks his neck, killing him in cold blood.As the police arrive, Fred and Tony show their badges to them and reveal themselves to be officers of a "special squad" of police which carry out summary executions of criminals who would get way with crimes through legal technicalities. Fred and Tony report to their boss, known only as the Captain (Adolfo Celi), who knows full well of the excesses of his team. While the Captain plays lip-service to hauling them over the coals over their amoral and vicious tactics to capture or kill criminals, he couldn't care less since more and more thugs and common criminals continue to get away with murder, robbery, rape, and other violent crimes on legal technicalities.When Fred and Tony learn from an informant, named Morandi, about an illicit gambling joint located in the poor side of town, the two vicious officers travel over there one evening and proceed to torch all of the cars parked outside purely for revenge against the owners and the patrons who go there in the first place. Fred and Tony's exploits soon come under scrutiny by a high ranking inspector (Daniele Dublino) who is pressuring the Captain to have the elite, but troublesome team, disbanded. But the Captain soon learns about some things the inspector does in his off-time which leads Fred and Tony to take some action against the inspector.More exploits continue between the two amoral cops, whom are also roommates in a squalid apartment in a dangerous part of the city. When their once-a-week maid arrives one time to clean up the place, they proceed to taunt the poor woman by suggesting they have both had sex with her daughter. Norma (Silvia Dionisio), the attractive secretary to the Captain, is practically the den mother to them whom they like to chat up with during their breaks at the station. When Fred suggests to Norma he should have sex with her, she sarcastically replies that she would prefer a threesome (with Tony) for both of them would give her a few too many orgasms.Another day or two later, Tony and Fred are called to the scene of a hostage situation where the city police commissioner and several of his officials ask for their help to defuse a dangerous complication where three armed men have taken a middle-aged woman hostage in her house and threaten to kill her unless they receive a car outside the house. While Tony plays decoy by driving up to the house in a car, Fred sneaks out back on his motorcycle. When the thugs realize that they are being set up, they fall back into the house where Fred smashes through the back door on his motorcycle and shoots and kills two of the kidnappers. With the lead kidnapper holding the woman as a shield, Tony runs in through the front door and guns the last thug down.Another day later, Tony and Fred stake out the scene of a bank where a robbery of an armored truck will take place. The two cops don silenced pistols and kill all of the robbery gang from the getaway driver, to the lookouts, and the masked robbers themselves before slipping away.In between all of these adventures, Fred and Tony go after a noted crime boss, named Roberto Pasquini (Renato Salvatori), who runs most of the crime in the city. The two cops first worm their way into the apartment of Lena (Flavia Fabiani), Pasquini's niece. Fred makes a half-hearted attempt to question the woman, but cannot resist hitting her in the face. But this appears to rouse the disturbed woman and soon the two of them are having sex in the nearby bedroom where she tells them about Pasquini's hideout.Meanwhile, the corrupt inspector reports the findings of Fred and Tony to Pasquini until he is transfered to another department after his connection to the crime boss becomes suspect.Fred and Tony travel to a river barge where one of Pasquini's gambling casinos are following the tip given to them by Lena. While all of the attending gambles flee, Fred and Tony torture two of the thugs to find out where Pasquini's new hideout is. The thugs refuse to talk which prompts Fred and Tony to leave... and leave the thugs tied up. The two thugs then inform Pasquini who decides to take out the troublesome police officers.While Fred and Tony are at a quarry outside the city playfully shooting at tin cans for target practice, four of Pasquini's thugs arrive and a shootout begins where Fred and Tony sucessfully kill all of the thugs. Afterwords, the Captain tells Fred and Tony to go into hiding until Pasquini is caught or killed. Not used to being told what to do, Fred and Tony go back to their informant Morandi, who recently had one of his eyes gouged out by Pasquini's henchmen for his drug use and ratting him out to the two vice cops. Morandi decides to help Fred and Tony one last time before he goes into hiding for good.Morandi goes to Pasquini whom is hiding out on a yacht docked on the river to inform them about the progress of Fred and Tony. Morandi goes back and confirms to them that Pasquini is indeed on the yacht. When Fred and Tony return with Morandi, they find the boat deserted with only Pasquini's blond mistress on board. Anticipating that Morandi is in cahoots with the police, Pasquini and his chief henchman are on the docks and in a warehouse where they have the boat wired with explosives to blow it up with the two cops on board. However, they are saved with the arrival of the Captain who personally arrives and guns down both Pasquini and his henchmen before leaving. While Morandi and the girl flee the scene, Fred and Tony leave the yacht after hearing the gunshots and see the Captain driving away... aware that he just saved their hides again.As a final act of senseless violence, Fred and Tony blow up Pasquini's boat anyway simply because that its there and that confiscating it would not achieve anything.
    

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