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Arrested Development

Assume the Position with Mr. Wuhl

Mr. Show with Bob and David

Tenacious D

The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret

W/Bob and David

Running Wilde

Joe Frank: Somewhere Out There

It's a Disaster

Funny How?

Run Ronnie Run


            Toy company Heartland Playsystems is acquired by the multinational conglomerate GloboTech Industries, which is expanding from manufacturing high-quality military hardware. GloboTech CEO Gil Mars (Denis Leary) pays a visit to Heartland to meet with Larry Benson (Jay Mohr) and Irwin Wayfair (David Cross) concerning their newest projects, which involve the creation of intelligent, interactive toys.Irwin offers the Gorgonites, peaceful creatures whose mission is to gather information about Earth, prompting children to learn with them, whereas Larry presents the Commando Elite, a special task force of action figures. Despite Irwin's objections, Mars chooses the ugly-looking Gorgonites as the Commando Elite's enemies and imposes a three-month deadline, which Irwin protests as 'impossible' due to the rigorous testing and design period required.Through Larry's inexperience with the GloboTech database, he commits a critical mistake: rather than standard toy-related computer chips, the action figures are fitted with surplus X-1000 "intelligence" chips designed for use by the military.Three months later, schoolboy Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith) and his parents Stuart (Kevin Dunn) and Irene (Ann Magnuson) have moved to Cleveland, Ohio, hoping for a fresh start after Alan's expulsion from two schools for playing practical jokes. His father Stuart owns an unpopular traditional toy store that does not sell electronic toys or violent action figures. Stuart goes on a business trip, leaving Alan in charge of the store, hoping that Alan will prove worthy of his trust. During his absence, Alan sees a box containing Commando Elite and Gorgonite toys bound for another larger toy store, and convinces the delivery truck driver Joe (Dick Miller) to leave him a complete set of each to sell, so as to make the shop wealthier and more sophisticated. Joe initially resists, but relents after Alan pleads with him. When released from their boxes, the toys become animated and begin to wage war against each other. Alan's neighbor and romantic interest Christy Fimple (Kirsten Dunst) visits the store with her younger brother Timmy (Jacob Smith) who stumbles across the feuding toys in the back room, and is shot by Elite Commander Chip Hazard. Because the toys' weapons are merely imitations, he is not hurt and pleads his sister to buy one of them. Alan and Christy later lock up the store and part ways, while the Gorgonite leader called Archer (voiced by Frank Langella) hides in Alan's backpack.During the night, Chip Hazard (voiced by Tommy Lee Jones) activates the others of the Commando Elite consisting of Kip Killagan (voiced by Ernest Borgnine), Brick Bazooka (voiced by George Kennedy), Butch Meathook (voiced by Jim Brown), Nick Nitro (voiced by Clint Walker), and Link Static (voiced by Bruce Dern). Chip issues functional weapons, and orders all Gorgonites in the store to be destroyed. During the ensuing melee, the Commandos and Gorgonites make a mess. The Gorgonites, who are programmed to lose any battle with the Elite, hide in a garbage dumpster behind the store.At Alan's house, Alan discovers Archer in his backpack; but the Gorgonite refuses to respond in any 'intelligent' manner. Eventually, Alan realizes that the X-1000 is, in fact an 'intelligent' computer chip that is capable of learning, reasoning, and adapting, and has turned the former 'toys' into artificial intelligence.The next day, at Archer's direction, Alan finds the remains of one destroyed Gorgonite Troglokhan, but no sign of the Commando Elite or the remaining Gorgonites. Alan manages to repair most of the damage done to the store by their fight and calls the company to complain about the Commandos' actions, but receives an apathetic response and is transferred to a voice-mail machine, where he leaves an angry message but is unable to record his telephone number.Archer tries to talk to Alan, but the furious Alan tells Archer to 'shut up and stop talking'. Archer obeys and remains silent until later in the night.Alan and Archer headhome on Alan's bike, but are closely followed by the Commando Elite. Brick Bazooka is sent to assassinate Archer, and is caught in the bike's wheel and has his legs and hips torn off by the spokes. After reparing Brick, Chip notes Alan's House and orders the Commando Elite to move in. During the night, the Commandos enter the house, capture Archer, and interrogate him in the kitchen over the garbage disposal. Alan awakens, saves Archer, drives off the Commando Elite, and jams Commando Nick Nitro into the garbage disposal, destroying him from the knees down. Nick escapes out the window while Alan is caught by his parents, to whom he is forced to confess his illegal acquisition of the toys.The parent-to-son discussion becomes a heated argument when Alan asserts that the toys were responsible for his father's crafting tools missing, leading his parents to suspect he might be using drugs and regressing to his mischievous lifestyle. Alan, furious at Archer for not supporting him, demands why he did not speak up to prove to his parents that the toys are alive, to which Archer responds by repeating Alan's earlier command to 'shut up'. Alan worries that he will suffer losses of others' trust if the Gorgonites have been destroyed, whereupon Archer replies that the Gorgonites must be alive, because the Commandos are still seeking them.The Commandos regroup in the Fimples' garage next-door, where Chip Hazard delivers a stirring, noticeably incoherent speech to his followers. Nick crawls his way into the garage and dies in Chip's arms. He then announces that Alan, for rescuing Archer, must be eliminated. The Commandos begin to convert all the sharp tools, electronics, and other hardware into makeshift vehicles and miniature weapons of mass destruction.Alan returns to the toy store in the morning and retrieves Gorgonites Slamfist (voiced by Christopher Guest), Ocula (vocal effects done by Jim Cummings), Punch-It (voiced by Harry Shearer), Scratch-It (also voiced by Christopher Guest), Insaniac (voiced by Michael McKean), and finds Troglokhan, who has been repaired by the Gorgonites as Freakenstein (also voiced by Michael McKean) from parts of Alan's father's radio. They thereafter use his computer to seek out their imagined homeland of Gorgon.That night, the Commando Elite tap the phone lines and discover Alan and Christy's relationship. They enter Christy's room while she is away and find her collectible Gwendy dolls. Chip retrieves Nick Nitro's body and tear open his head to find his X-1000 chip. They create a Frankenstein-esque laboratory in her room to raise the Gwendy dolls, using Nick's chip as their mindset. With the "reinforcements" lying in ambush, they drug Christy's parents Marion (Wendy Schaal) and Phil (Phil Hartman), tie up her brother, and scare off her visiting sweetheart Brad (Jonathan Bouck), then force Christy to a hostage video demanding the surrender of the Gorgonites. Alan and Archer trick the Commandos by putting an old radio into a cardboard box, playing a tape of supposed Gorgonites debating the merits of an idea. They rescue Christy after defeating the Gwendy dolls (voiced by Sarah Michelle Gellar and Christina Ricci) animated by the Elite in battle.The Commandos blast their way out of the garage on their vehicles and pursue Christy, Alan, and Archer, who escape on Christy's motor scooter. In the chase, all the Elite crash into a pond and are destroyed. Chip, however, survives the crash with part of his face melted and floats downstream to a local toy store. Chip then hijacks a shipment of new Commando Elite figures by forcing the driver to Alan's house.As the parents meet and begin arguing about what has happened, Larry and Irwin of the toy company arrive in response to Alan's earlier phone call. They have learned about the dangers of the X-1000 chip (and a possible weakness) from its designer, and are trying to circumvent any lawsuits.Returning to the Abernathy home, Chip Hazard activates dozens of Commandos and declares war on the Gorgonites and their human allies, whom they attack by cutting off the electricity supply and then shooting nails, flaming tennis balls, and firework rockets at the house. The humans are frantic and scared until Irwin and Larry recall that an electro-magnetic pulse might deactivate the X-1000 chip: desperate to find an available source thereof, Mr. Fimple suggests connecting a power-transformer in parallel, resulting in an explosion. Alan sends Christy, Larry, and Irwin to Fimple's house to turn on every single piece of Mr. Fimple's massive assembly of electronic components, so that the power will be flowing to overload the transformer. He then prepares to go out into the 'warzone' to complete this task himself, only to be stopped by his father, who wishes to protect him. Alan disobeys his father and goes to activate the E.M.P. Nearby, the Gorgonites override their program and decide to achieve victory, then set out to do so.Chip Hazard flies after Alan in a toy helicopter, but Freakenstein hijacks one of the vehicles and uses its weapons to shoot it down. Before it crashes into the Fimples' new satellite dish, Hazard ejects himself from it and attempts to knock Alan down. The situation changes when Archer confronts Hazard; after a brief fight, Hazard kicks Archer from the pole. In retaliation, Alan grabs Hazard and jams him between the transformers to activate the E.M.P., destroying the Commando Elite and their doll allies. The Gorgonites survive by hiding beneath a fallen satellite-signal receiver and are discovered later by Alan.The next morning, Gil Mars arrives to bribe all witnesses to the crisis into silence. Larry is fearful to lose his job, but Mars proposes that they increase the price of the Commando Elite and sell them to the military of a South American nation. Alan and Christy kiss passionately. At the end of the film, the Gorgonites set out in search for their home, Gorgon, on Stuart's model ship in a river in Yosemite National Park.(Source: WikiPedia. Bangs_McCoy)
    

Small Soldiers

The Dark Divide

The Muslims Are Coming!

The Grand


            HITS is a dark comedy exploring the nature of fame in 21st Century YouTube America. The film takes place in a small town in upstate New York populated by people who trade in unrealistic expectations. Its a story in which fame, delusion, earnestness, and recklessness meet, shake hands, and disrupt the lives around them.
    

Hits

Soul Quest Overdrive

Crashing

Demoted

Alvin and the Chipmunks

Bliss

The Legend of Secret Pass


            At an arena for a charity benefit rock concert, the Chipmunks are performing and the crowd goes wild. Alvin takes the lead, and then begins to show off, and Dave (Jason Lee) calls him over and tells him to stop it. He reminds him that this is a charity event, and not all about Alvin, and to stop it, but Alvin refuses. He slings the cord to his electric guitar over a high beam, and swings over the crowd while playing his guitar. Inadvertently, Alvin's cord knocks a huge Alvin-cutout loose, and it hits Dave. Dave is taken to the hospital, and is covered in gauze, a neck brace, and traction and casts on every limb.Before going under sedation, Dave tells the chipmunks that Aunt Jackie (the one Theodore calls Popcorn Jackie since she sends them popcorn) will take care of them, and that he has arranged for them to go to school. Lastly, he puts Simon in charge and tells them to be good.The chipmunks fly home, and see Popcorn Jackie waiting for them with cousin Toby (Zachary Levi). Toby neglects to set the brake on her wheelchair, and she rolls backwards down two flights of stairs, and out the doors. An ambulance takes her, and Toby says he'll watch the boys.At home, he tells the boys to stay out of trouble, while he is busy playing video games. They play around and eat junk food since no one is watching. Dave calls, and Alvin decides not to tell him about Jackie's accident, and hangs up on him quickly. As usual, Theodore wakes up at night from a nightmare, and goes into Toby's room and asks if he can stay there. Toby agrees, and tells him that chipmunks don't have anything to fear but eagles. Eagles with large talons that want to catch and eat chipmunks This scares Theodore, and he runs out of Toby's room. Now Theodore is scared of eagles.Toby takes the boys to school, and drops them at the curb. They walk in, and are nearly stepped on amid the chaos of the high school hallways. Theodore sees the school mascot is an eagle and remembers Toby's story, and runs away, scared. In homeroom, all the girls in the class go mad for the chipmunks and leave the football hero and his gang. They vow to get even with the chipmunks.Back at JETT Records, where Ian (David Cross), their former manager worked, Ian is broke, and living in the back room. He blames all his loss on the chipmunks and wants to get back at them someday. A FedEx envelope arrives, and three little girl chipmunks chew their way out: Brittany, Jeannette and Eleanor. They want to meet Alvin, Simon and Theodore, and sing with them. Ian lies to the girls, telling them that the chipmunks broke his heart, and got too arrogant, and turned against him, and left him penniless. He hears the girls sing, and realizes he can make a new start with their talent, especially Brittany's.Back at school, the chipmunks have lunch with the girls, and the football guys are jealous. They come over to give Alvin a hard time, but before they can, the chipmunks give the boys wedgies, which makes the girls laugh. Theodore sees a huge bronze eagle statue in the foyer, and runs away, still frightened by eagles. Ryan (Kevin G. Schmidt), the mean football guy, grabs Simon and dunks his head in the toilet, then drops him in. Alvin saves him from drowning, and when they leave the restroom, they see the same boys poking Theodore in the butt and making fun of him, and calling him fat. Alvin and Simon attack and end up in the principal's office. Principal Rubin (Wendie Malick) tells them they have two choices: suspension, or represent the school in a Sing-Off competition. The school's music program is about to be shut down due to budget cuts, so winning the competition and the $25,000 prize would save the program. The chipmunks agree to do it.Back at home, the boys watch Meerkat Manor together. Toby is busy with his video games and neglects caring for them. They try to tell Toby about their bad day at school, but he just tells them it will be better tomorrow.First thing at school the next day is P.E., and the chipmunks are getting hit by ball after ball in dodge ball. Alvin, though, challenges Ryan, and catches the ball thrown at him. Ryan talks to him, and says that he has good hands, and they might be able to use him on the football team. Alvin is excited but Simon and Theodore are worried. Alvin works out with the football guys in the gym, and starts to become one of them. He even moves to their table at lunch, leaving Simon and Theodore.Ian sees a notice in the newspaper about the upcoming Sing-Off, and realizes this is his big chance to break the girl chipmunks into the business. He enrolls them in school, and reminds them to avoid Alvin, Simon and Theodore because they can't be trusted.After school, Alvin, Simon and Theodore are rehearsing, and Ian comes by. He brings the girls, called The Chipettes and has them sing for Principal Rubin. He challenges her decision to have The Chipmunks be the designated singers for the school, so she agrees to a competition Friday night, where applause will decide if it's the Chipmunks or the Chipettes to represent the school. When they are at school together the next day, Alvin tries to talk to Brittany, but she snubs him. He tries to warn her about Ian, but she won't believe him.Ian works the Chipettes hard in preparation for the competition, and comments that Eleanor is too short. He shoves both Eleanor and Jeannette (glasses) towards the back, and says that Brit is going to be a mega-star.Dave calls and talks to Toby. Toby tells him about Aunt Jackie's injury and being in the hospital, and Dave starts to worry. Before he can ask more, Toby hangs up.The football guys decide to mess with Simon, and tell him he's been selected to be the Litter Monitor. There isn't such a position; they just do it to embarrass Simon. Alvin finds out, but doesn't come to help Simon, as he doesn't want to look bad with his new group of friends. Simon gets angry at Ryan, and Ryan tells him that it's a big joke. Simon leaves, mad. Alvin is supposed to play in the big away-game on Friday night and he is excited, but realizes it is at the same time as the competition against the Chipettes.Helping with Toys for Tots, Theodore and Eleanor meet, and hit it off. She is wearing huge shoes, to make her taller, and stumbles a lot. Theodore tells her she doesn't need them--she is perfect just the way she is. She blushes, and they smile at each other.At the football game, Alvin is frustrated becaise he hasn't played once. With nine seconds left and one play, Ryan calls him in, and they run a special "Alvin play." Ryan passes the football long, downfield, and Alvin is ON the ball, and when it lands in the end zone, Alvin is on the bottom, and catches it, making a touchdown, and they win. They celebrate afterwards, and Alvin goes with them. Back at the school, the Chipettes sing, and when it is time for the Chipmunks to sing, there is no Alvin. Simon and Theodore go to the podium and explain that without Alvin, they can't sing. They are booed by the students, and the principal proclaims the Chipettes the winner. Alvin shows up much later, when it is all deserted, and realizes his big mistake. He goes home, and is ignored by Simon and Theodore.In the morning, they find a note from Theodore, saying he has run away from home, and is at the zoo. He has gone to live with the meerkats. He goes through the fence, underneath a sign that says Meerkat Exhibit Closed -- Birds of Prey Exhibit Open. Without knowing it, Theodore walks in and faces a large eagle, of which he is deathly afraid. Toby, Alvin and Simon arrive to help him. Alvin distracts the eagle, and then they run for the fence. Theodore gets stuck since he is chubby, and as Alvin pulls, Simon pushes. They make it out in time, and Alvin apologizes for his behavior and they make up.Ian tells the Chipettes they are opening a concert for Britney Spears, but it is at the same time as the big Sing-Off. He says the Sing-Off never mattered; he just wanted to get them seen so he could make money and be famous again. Ian also says he is only talking Brittany, and when she refuses, he locks all three of them in a cage and puts them in a limo. While he is busy, Brittany uses his cell phone and calls Toby, and asks for help. Alvin tries to tell her how to unlock the lock on the cage. Alvin hops on a motorcycle and tells them he is coming to help.Pulling alongside the limo, Alvin sees the girls have gotten out of the cage and are on the roof. He throws helmets to each of them, and then they jump down to his motorcycle. They ride off, and Ian is furious. Ian stops and gets a remote-controlled helicopter and chases the chipmunks with it. They end up on the skids, hanging on for dear life, and Britney has an idea: they all throw their helmets at Ian, and he drops the remote control. They lean hard to catch it, and Jeannette saves it, and now steers them to the competition. They fly in just as it is their turn, and the audience applauds and cheers. All six chipmunks decide to perform together, and they sing,We Are Family, and unanimously win, and save the school's music program. Dave and Toby are in the audience, and cheer.On the way out, Dave hobbles with Alvin. He has a cast on one leg, uses crutches, and has a neck brace on. Alvin tells him he offered the Chipettes their house and said they could live there with them. Dave looks concerned, and says Alvin!At the Staples Center for the Britney Spears concert, we see the Chipettes announced and out comes Ian, wearing a gold strapless dress, and with two sock puppets on his hands, and one taped to his head. He tries to be the Chipettes, and is booed, and Security hauls him offstage.Back at home, the Chipmunks are in a three-tiered bunk bed on one side of the room, and the Chipettes are in a three-tiered bunk bed on the other side of the room. Dave tells them good night, but Alvin refuses to go to bed. Lights on, lights off, lights on, lights off. Dave tries to grab Alvin in the dark, stumbles, a loud crash sounds, and we hear him yell, ALVIN!
    

Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel

David Cross

David Cross

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