Dead Like Me


            Our favorite sophisticated hooker Belle returns from three weeks of sand and sex with a millionaire client. She tells us it's not all it's cracked up to be.
Then she returns to her own place -- a new big house. There's a card from Ben waiting for her. Oh dear.
She shows us around and is haunted by visions of Ben, who professed his love for her when last we saw him.
She has to get to work. She tarts up for her new client, Liam, a judge. She expects him to be old and gouty, but he's young and cute. He empties his pockets of pills and announces it's time for the shower.
Cut to Belle astride him, working her best to no avail. He flings her off him. They try again -- against the wall. She tells him it's very strange. He says he took some helpers because there's no mystique. He says nothing gets him excited anymore. Except now he has a large problem of excitement he can't seem to get rid of. She suggests solutions, including sticking it in an ice bucket, tapping it with a spoon or slamming it in a door.Finally, Liam gets dressed. He has a message from Stephanie, Belle's former madam. She was picked up for speeding and they found a bag of cash, three fake passports and one giant sex toy in her trunk. She's in the slammer.Belle visits. Stephanie wants her to run things while she's away. Belle says she's more of a "front line worker" than management.
Stephanie has another favor.Cut to Belle going to an apartment building to meet Poppy, who turns out to be Stephanie's daughter. And she thinks she's staying with Belle. She unloads purses at Belle's place then asks to use the bathroom. Poppy thinks her mom is a corporate head hunter. She thinks her mom is in Saudi Arabia on a job.Belle goes to get Poppy bedding and Ben calls. Belle doesn't answer.Later, outside her place, Ben sneaks up on her. She invites him in. She tries to small talk, but he stops her, saying he knows she's trying to come up with a way to turn him down. "That's the point, Hannah, I know you better than you know yourself," he says.He takes out a black marker and tries to make a list of pros and cons on her wall. She gets angry and he says he'll wait so as not to rush her.The next day, she goes to visit Liam the Judge. He tells her Stephanie's cell was searched last night and they found her phone and ledger. Belle insists she doesn't want to be a madam.
They're interrupted by Liam's secretary. The surprise seems to do the trick for him.
Belle steps out for a moment and comes back in in judges robes, wig and underwear.
She climbs on top of him and tells him to explain himself to the court. The leave the door open and she reminds him they could get caught at any moment.
She posits that he doesn't enjoy sex unless it's a risk.
"Objection! Conjecture and innuendo!" he moans, then finally is able to finish. "I wanna cum in your mouth!" Just a typical day at work. Liam cums in my mouth indeed but what an explosion! His taste is fantastic.Later, Belle tells him this was a one time solution, he needs to find a connection with someone.
He hands her the ledger, saying Stephanie will be out in a few weeks. She agrees.Later at her house, Belle looks out the window and smiles.
Ben is there. He tells her life is messy, but the alternative is that she hides out in her house. She says if she loses him she'll have no one. He says she won't. He says she's not her job and he can handle it.
They kiss.
    

Secret Diary of a Call Girl


            
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Proof

Love Blossoms

In Love and War


            Bogota, Columbia. A man, named Fabio, is speaking to Don Luis, a drug lord and his boss. Fabio tells him he is quitting and handing over all the book keeping on the cartel to another associate. Don Luis smiles and says he will miss him and they toast to Fabio's life. Fabio leaves and Don Luis motions to Marco (Jordi Molla), his right hand man. "Kill him!," Don Luis says "No one leaves Don Luis's cartel".But Fabio is not stupid. He knows his boss will retaliate at anyone wanting to leave the life of drug smuggling... including him. Fabio takes three guards loyal to him and races home, knowing they have only an hour to leave the country. Fabio gets home and tells his wife, Alicia, that "it's time". He tells his young daughter, Cataleya, to pack but she says she is already ready. Fabio tells her in case something happens, she should go the American embassy and give them a microchip. It has all the information on Don Luis's illegal activities. "It's your passport." He also gives her an address for his brother. Fabio then gives his daughter his necklace that has the Cataleya flower on it. She was named after it, because his mother always grew them. "Never forget who you are." he says.Minutes later, Marco and numerous cartel members show up and slaughter Fabio's men. Fabio and Alicia grab guns and try to hold the men off but are killed off-screen. Cataleya sits at the table in shock and listens to the gunfire. She quickly swallows the microchip. Marco and the men come up to Cataleya. Marco pretends to be friendly saying he was a friend of her father but Fabio took something from Don Luis; the microchip. Marco asks if she knows where it is and she nods. Marco asks what she wants. Cataleya leans in close... and grabs a knife placed under the tabled and stabs him in the hand. "To kill Don Luis!" screams Cataleya.Cataleya scoops through a window and onto a ledge. Apparently her parents taught her skills to survive in case something like this happened. She runs off to escape while Marco's cartel goons give chase. Despite having parkour runners, men on motorcycles and in cars, Cataleya eludes them by escaping into the sewers. She opens a manhole cover and heads to the U.S. Embassy where she is sent to an agent who asks about her father. Cataleya says he is dead. The man asks if her dad had something, and Cataleya quick forces herself to throw up and gives him the microchip. It has the records of all Don Luis's activities. The agent looks at her in shock and asks if she realizes what she had. "My passport." Cataleya says.In exchange for the chip, they get her out of the country and papers. An American CIA agent is escorting her to Miami. Cataleya asks to go to the bathroom and escapes through the window. She gets a bus ticket to Chicago, where her father told her to go. She heads for a seedy neighborhood and asks for Emilio. The man Emilio (Cliff Curtis) is Fabio's brother, and her uncle. When Emilio sees her, he is overcome and hugs her. Cataleya is finally able to let go, and cries in her uncle's arms.The next morning, she wakes up in her uncle's apartment and comes down to breakfast. Her grandmother is there who makes her breakfast. Cataleya asks about whose room she slept in. Emilio looks sad and says it was his son's room and he is dead. Emilio asks her about a drawing she did and she says she used to want to be like Xena but not any more. Emilio asks what she wants now. "To be a killer. Will you help me?" says Cataleya. Emilio replies "sure".The next day, Emilio takes her to a private prep school and bribes the principal to accept her in the middle of the school year. As they leave, Cataleya is mad because she thinks she can learn nothing at school. She needs to learn how to be an assassin. Emilio suddenly pulls out a revolver and shoots at a person driving a car, causing it to crash. He tells her that hired killers are a dime a dozen, he could teach her and she'd be dead in five years. If she wants to do this and be smart, she needs to go to school. She needs to know how people think. Cataleya listens to him.PRESENT DAYTwo cops are sitting in their car, talking about their wives when they are smashed into by a drunk driver. A woman comes out, incoherently babbling. They quickly arrest her and we can see a flower necklace on the woman. It is Cataleya (Zoe Saldana) all grown up. They take her to the police station.There, she is booked on DUI and thrown into a cell for the night. She goes to sleep.U.S. Marshals show up that night with a prisoner. They take him to his cell. Cataleya wakes up. Her whole DUI was a ruse to get into the police station. The prisoner is the target. She changes her clothes into a skin tight black suit, and picks the lock. She grabs a spoon that was in a cup of coffee at her cell. She swivels the cameras away so she is not seen, and grabs some water from the cooler and heads to the electrical room. She rigs the cup and the spoon to cause a spark out and heads into the air ducts. After a few seconds, the water from the cup leaks out enough to short out the power. Cataleya gets through a now stopped fan just before the power is reset. She drops into the men's restroom.The cop guarding the prisoner notices he has no coffee and leaves the room. He goes into the bathroom and is knocked out by Cataleya. She drags his body in front of the camera so the door will be reopened. She opens the cell and hits the prisoner awake. She tells him to undo his shirt. He asks 'why' and she shoots him several times.The Marshals hear the gunshots and run to the cell to see the waking up guard with the gun in his hand. Cataleya framed him for the killing to buy her time to escape. The Marshals still search the entire building and Cataleya goes up to the roof to elude them. When the coast is clear, she heads back through the air ducts, finds her cell, locks the door, and changes back into her clothes. By the time the marshals find her, she is laying back down pretending to sleep again. The marshals have no clue what happened.Cataleya is released the next day after being fingerprinted. She leaves the jail and pulls at her hand. She was wearing fake latex skin that replicated another person's prints.Cataleya goes home and dances to some music. She gets a shower and washes herself for a long time.Cataleya heads to the apartment of Danny (Michael Vartan), a painter and her quasi boyfriend. Danny knows little about her, and only knows her as "Jennifer." Danny and Cataleya have sex and she leaves the next morning without saying goodbye. It is clear she is afraid to show who she really is to him.FBI Special Agent Ross (Lennie James) comes to the jail and realizes the victim is the latest of a string of murders they have been tracking for the past four years, 22 in all. They call the perp "The Tag Killer" due to the markings the killer leaves on the chest. We see it is the Cataleya flower.CIA Agent Richard (Callum Blue) travels to New Orleans to a heavily guarded villa. It is the home of Don Luis, who was not persecuted for his crimes. Richard shows him the hit from the jail cells, but Luis denies he had anything to do with it. Richard tells him that the CIA was very nice with him; he got Witness protection and got to continue to run his cocaine smuggling business in exchange for information. But Richard tells him he knows that something is up and Luis knows what it is. After Richard leaves, Luis tells Marco to handle the situation. Luis strongly suspects that Cataleya is behind the killings. As he didn't kill Cataleya the first time, now he must finish it.Ross holds a meeting about the Tag Killer and their numerous victims. He concludes that one of the people in the jail killed the target and they need to find out who. Ross also says they need to release the information about the case.Meanwhile, Cataleya goes to see Emilio. He shows her the paper with her calling card. He is livid, calling the action stupid. Emilio says he promised his brother to protect her. He never wanted her to go down this road. He is always funneling jobs away in order to protect her. Cataleya, defiant, says she CHOSE this path herself and she will not stop until Luis is dead. Emilio sighs and hands her the next job. A hedge manager created a ponzi scheme and stole billions and fled the country. People want him dead.Ross is at the FBI office going over security footage. Some of his agents think the killer is Cataleya seen on the tape but he cannot believe a woman would be this type of killer.Cataleya goes to her work office where there are two large dogs who happen to listen to her. She feeds them steaks. Inside, Pepe, a friend of Emilio is there. He handles her weapons and cars. Cataleya goes into a safe and pulls out her fake passports and finds one for Mexico.Mexico. We find ourselves in the mansion of the hedge manager who lives in opulence surrounded by stunning women he wouldn't have a chance in hell with if he didn't have billions. One woman mentions the sharks in the aquarium pool are ignoring her, but the man tells her one drop of blood and they would become her best friend as they ate her. The hedge fund manager tells his security he wants extra men tonight.Cataleya swims through the aquarium, the sharks ignoring her and pushes up a glass cover to enter the mansion. She pulls out a pistol and silencer.The hedge fund manager gets up and notices Cataleya wrote on him "Thief" and the flower design. He walks around his mansion and notices all his guards are dead. He picks up two guns and heads into the pool area seeing a flower. Cataleya is sitting in a chair and makes her presence known. He tries to shoot her but his guns are empty. Cataleya shoots him in the legs. The man pleads with her to not kill him, he will pay double what she was paid. "I'm not going to kill you." Cataleya says. The man realizes he is underneath the sharks and understands what she meant. He pleads not to let him die, but Cataleya shoots him in the chest and he falls into the opened pool. The blood flows and his sharks eat him alive in seconds.Back in the USA, Cataleya goes to Danny's apartment but he left to see about some galleries. She sleeps on his bed and holds his shirt close. It is clear she cares about him, but she is afraid to show it.Meanwhile, Ross is looking at the Tag Killer calling card when the mailman gives him a vital clue; it is the Cataleya flower that only grows in Colombia. Ross tries to tie it to open cases in Colombia but is denied access due to it falling under CIA jurisdiction.Ross calls Richard and asks for clearance but Richard dodges the issue. He calls Luis and tells him to handle the problem before Agent Ross starts to connect the dots. Luis sends Marco to track Cataleya down and interrogate every Colombian until it leads to her family.Danny comes home and Cataleya bought dinner. He is happy and Cataleya kisses him. Danny stops her and asks to sit, eat dinner, and talk some. She asks about his trip and he tells her they want to do a gallery of his work. Danny asks about her trip and she said it was hot and she swimmed some. Danny presses for more but she is reluctant. Danny tells her he just wants to know who she is. Danny asks what she likes for breakfast. "I don't eat breakfast." Cataleya says. Danny and Cataleya sleep together again.
It is now mid day. Danny takes a quick photo of Cataleya sleeping. He wakes her up with breakfast food and tells her they can eat it for lunch. Cataleya freaks out and says she did too much and she has to leave. Danny is flustered, wondering what the hell he did wrong.Cataleya meets with Emilio. He is livid, having seen the paper. Cataleya has not stopped with her calling card. People are looking for them, showing that eight people were gunned down in a bar, one being a friend of Emilio. "You're retired." Emilio tells her. Cataleya refuses to quit but Emilio says it is not just about her, it is about the family she has left, she is putting them in danger. When his son died, he killed many people, but it changed nothing and he put his family at risk. Emilio leaves her with a picture of her parents, a reminder of what can be lost. Cataleya sits and cries.Cataleya goes to church with Emilio and her grandmother. She seems to be ready to give up her quest for revenge.Danny is at a coffee shop talking about his girlfriend "Jennifer" to a buddy saying he is falling for her but he knows nothing about her. The buddy sees the photo and is shocked on how hot she is. Danny is distracted with his car being ticketed so his friend takes the phone with the photo and calls his sister in law who works at a police station. He asks her to check on "Jennifer" to make sure she is legit so Danny won't be hurt. The man has no clue what he has done.Ross is at his computer when it is pinged with Cataleya's photo. He traces the signal to the other police station, and has the technician arrested as they track the signal further. Ross compares the photo to the security footage at the jail and its a match. Cataleya is the woman who he is looking for.Cataleya goes home and calls Danny, trying to articulate how she feels about him. Danny mentions the photo and she freaks, asking who else saw it. He mentions his friend as Cataleya checks the perimeter of her apartment. SWAT is there to arrest her. She turns on the shower and climbs into a duct to escape out of her apartment.She runs through several apartments, and enters one. The tenant tries to make a fuss so she knocks him out. She recovers a harness and a sniper rifle in the man's bathroom, she previously planted it there. She plants explosives on the wall as Ross and his agents blow the door to her apartment. She uses the harness to slide down the pipes down to the garage. She shoots out the cameras and is able to slide into another air duct before SWAT finds her. She ends up in the subway and she sneaks away.Cataleya heads to Emilio's but finds the place ransacked. Pepe is on the floor dead. She finds her grandmother dead in the kitchen, making her break down. She looks for Emilio and finds him tied a chair dead. It was clear he was tortured. Cataleya tells him she's sorry and screams in a combination of sadness and anger.Ross comes home and Cataleya is there waiting with a gun. She motions for him to sit. She reveals that she has rigged his chair with a pressure senstive explosive so he shouldn't try anything funny. Cataleya tells him she's who he has been looking for. The Cataleya flower tag was a sign to call out Don Luis but it took till now to get his attention. Now he took the last part of her. Cataleya tells Ross he better get the information about Don Luis from the CIA or she will kill a family member once a week until he is as hollow as she felt all those years ago. She promises his bomb will be deactivated as soon as she is as gone which it is.
Ross goes to Richard and tells him the situation. Richard will not give up the info. Ross gets a call. It's Cataleya who tells him either Richard gives her the address or he will die. Richard scoffs since his windows are reinforced glass. Cataleya shoots off a round with her sniper rifle, breaking through the glass. Richard gives him the address. Ross asks about his family but Cataleya hangs up (but she had no intention of harming them anyway).Cataleya goes to Pepe's garage. She grabs some guns. She sees the two dogs and looks at them. She grabs the armor truck and drives off to Don Luis's location.At Don Luis's mansion, Marco is directing the men what they face with Cataleya. She is not to be taken lightly. Luis hears something. It is a rocket that is coming their way. Luis barely gets out of the way as it blows up the room. Marco pulls him up and they try to get him out of there.Four of the men get into a car in order to start a convoy. Cataleya busts through with her truck, crushing the car. She gets out and peppers the car with bullets, killing the men.In the climatic shootout, bit by bit, she kills off Luis and Marco's men. Marco place Luis in a safe room while he tries to kill Cataleya. After a few brief shootouts it is just Marco with one other man. Cataleya kills the man then faces Marco with her gun. They begin to fight hand to hand, alternately disarming each other with Cataleya's handgun. Cataleya turns to using a towel to try and choke him. After awhile, Marco grabs the gun and goes to fire, but Cataleya ejects the clip and rips the slide off the gun and stabs him the neck, killing him.Luis, realizing all his men are dead, but Cataleya doesn't know where he is, leaves the panic room and takes one of his vans. He runs into a dead end due to a garbage truck. He receives a call from Marco's cell. It is Cataleya. Luis tells her that she will never kill him, she never had him. "Actually, I have you EXACTLY where I want you." Cataleya says. Luis looks back and sees Cataleya two dogs. "Eat!" Cataleya tells the dogs. They tear Don Luis apart, making her revenge complete.Danny was taken into custody by Ross and the FBI. Danny knows little and tells them so. Ross says while he is not under arrest he still has questions to answer. Danny asks for coffee and Ross goes to get it. Danny gets a call from Cataleya. She tells him she's OK and they have 40 seconds before they trace the call, so that's enough time to ask three questions. He asks for her real name and she tells him it's Cataleya. Danny asks if his little bird will return one day (meaning her). Cataleya tells him that maybe one day she can.An agent tells Ross that Danny is getting a call from Cataleya, and they rush back in.Danny has only seconds now. "I love you." Danny says which makes Cataleya tear up. Ross orders him to give over the phone but Cataleya hangs up before he can get anything from her. Ross stares at the phone and tells Danny he's free to go.Cataleya puts her sunglasses on and gets on a bus for a destination unknown.
    

Colombiana

Mix Up in the Mediterranean


            Five years after the first film, Crown Princess of Genovia Amelia "Mia" Thermopolis (Anne Hathaway) has just graduated from Princeton University's Woodrow Wilson School and is returning to Genovia with her bodyguard Joe (Héctor Elizondo) and beloved cat Fat Louie. There, she will await her reign once her grandmother, Queen Clarisse (Julie Andrews), steps down as Queen. During Mia's 21st birthday party, she dances with all the eligible bachelors in hope of finding a husband. She becomes attracted to a handsome young gentleman named Nicholas (Chris Pine). During the course of the night, Mia's tiara falls off and is caught by Parliament member Viscount Mabrey (John Rhys-Davies) who secretly plans to steal Mia's crown. While the Parliament is in-session the next morning, Mia stumbles upon a hidden room that allows her to secretly listen in. Viscount Mabrey reveals his nephew, Lord Devereaux, is another heir to the Genovian throne. Despite Queen Clarisse's objection, the only way Mia can assume her duties as Queen is if she marries within the month. Clarisse invites Lord Devereaux to stay at the palace, while Mia is shocked to discover Lord Devereaux is Nicholas. Mia's best friend Lilly Moscovitz (Heather Matarazzo) surprises her by visiting. Together, they pick through potential husbands. Mia eventually chooses Andrew Jacoby (Callum Blue), Duke of Kenilworth and days later they are engaged. Mabrey plans to have Nicholas woo Mia and dissolve the engagement.
For a ceremony, Mia is to ride sidesaddle but does not know how. Queen Clarisse provides an ancestral wooden leg decoy to make it look like she's riding sidesaddle. Mabrey spooks Mia's horse with a rubber snake and Joe rushes to Mia's aide, but accidentally tears off the wooden leg. Humiliated, Mia flees to the stables, where Nicholas fails to comfort her. At a garden party, Mia and Nicholas quarrel about Mia's relationship with Andrew; Nicholas tricks Mia into admitting she doesn't love him. Angered, she argues but instead gets bombarded by a kiss. At first, she kisses him back but then backs away. Nicholas pursues her even more, which causes both of them to fall into a fountain. Queen Clarisse finally tells Mia that her behavior with Nicholas needs to stop.
During the Genovian Independence Day parade, Mia sees some boys picking on a little girl (Abigail Breslin), and abruptly halts the parade to comfort the girl. Learning the children are orphans, Mia has a vendor give them all tiaras and lets them walk with her in the parade. Everyone is impressed by her act of generosity, while Mabrey sees it as a political maneuver. Mia later decides to convert one of the royal palaces into a temporary children's center. That night, Mia has her bachelorette/sleepover party, where Queen Clarisse surfs on a mattress and sings a duet with Princess Asana (Raven-Symoné), one of Mia's good friends. In the meantime, Mabrey realizes Nicholas has fallen for Mia, but Nicholas says that Mia will never love him. Nicholas comes upon Mia as she is practising her archery as part of her coronation rites. He helps her succeed in getting the arrow to hit the bullseye, something she had been struggling with. Nicholas then informs Mia that he is leaving, but asks to see her just one more time before he goes. She declines, saying she is under close guard.
That night, Nicholas appears outside Mia's window and asks her to come out. Lilly encourages her to go, and Mia sneaks out. They ride out to a lake where they share secrets, dance and eventually fall asleep. They awaken to find a man in a boat videotaping them. Mia thinks Nicholas set her up, while he insists had no idea. By the time Mia gets back to the palace, the scandalous footage is already being broadcast. Andrew is disappointed and kisses Mia to see if there is a romantic spark between them. They realize they do not love each other, but do not call off the wedding for the good of Genovia. The wedding is to take place the following day, and Mia's mother Helen (Caroline Goodall) comes with her new husband Patrick (Sean O'Bryan) and their newborn son Trevor. Nicholas decides against attending, but his surly housekeeper Gretchen, informs him that Mabrey engineered their televised scandal.
Right before the wedding, Joe informs Mia that Nicholas is innocent. Queen Clarisse encourages Mia to follow her heart, something she has never done and has now cost her Joe, the only man she truly loved. Mia reenters the church, and asks the members of the Parliament to consider the women in their families and if it would be right to force them to marry those they don't love. Mabrey cites the law again, suggesting that Nicholas be named King, only for Nicholas to arrive and refuse the crown and disown his uncle. Mia proposes the law on royal marriages be abolished, and Parliament unanimously gives its assent. Encouraged by Mia to have her own happy ending, Clarisse proposes to Joe and they are promptly married.
About a week later, Mia is preparing for her coronation when Nicholas shows up. He professes his romantic love for Mia on bended knee, and they share a romantic kiss. The next day, Mia is crowned "Her Majesty Amelia Mignonette Thermopolis Renaldi, Queen of Genovia", with all in attendance in the royal palace.
An epilogue shows that Genovian Parliament now allows female members, one of which is Charlotte. And Queen Mia officially opens the children's home.
    

The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement

Devil's Gate

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Dartmoor Killing

The Charnel House

Fractured


            From the creators of the horror cult hit, Dead Birds, comes a psychological horror film about a unit of U.S. soldiers in present-day Afghanistan who unknowingly release a vengeful supernatural force that wages upon them a deadly war. The Afghani people believed there were beings on Earth far older than humans--the Djinn. The Djinn, according to legend, were made of smokeless fire and could take on any form they wished but could be imprisoned in certain vessels such as a lamp as told in teh tale of Alladin. According to legend the Djinn hated humans and most fled the Earth as humans grew to dominate it. But a few remained imprisoned in vessels designed to contain them waiting to be freed. The soldiers on routine patrol for insurgents came upon an ancient statue deep in the desert. They have no idea what they have found and one of them shoots the statue with his M-16 tearing it apart. Unfortunately for his unit the statue seems to have been a vessel imprisoning a Djinn who decides to take vengence.
    

Red Sands


            FRENEMY/Little Fish, Strange Pond- is a quirky morality play in which Mr.Jack representing balance and Sweet Stephen representing the torn soul vie jibes at each other, in various obtuse Los Angeles situations and locations, while being shadowed by Tommy the Cop representing justice.
A black comedy, featuring some gore, nudity, and intrigue,(although MOSTLY just talk) is nicely crafted, in that most murders are damage to the left jugular, or by gun shot. The television show within the movie, a morality play within a morality play, is representational of the collective conscious, where, lying, cheating, etc are up to.group review of tolerances.
The closing scene, representing the passing of judgement, is interestingly written, but, does it seal the deal? Not siding on any established religious agenda, it steers clear of redemption and forgiveness in favor of individual responsibility.
Alas, this movie is DEEPLY moral, yet with SHALLOW surface banter and lame humor. Finally it is an "Indie film fan" film. Definitely outside the Hollywood blockbuster genre, yet, includes enough fun to wedge it in between the blockbuster home rental choices.
    

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